An Open Letter to the Federal Reserve

Dear Ben Bernanke and distinguished members of the Federal Reserve:

We are writing today to formally solicit your help in obtaining approvals to start a new bank holding company, Money Unlimited. We of course understand that the approval process for a new bank is typically done through the FDIC, but as the Federal Reserve plays a crucial role in our business plan, we hope that you can expedite the process.

First, let us assure you that we will start from day one as a very well capitalized institution, with no need to raise outside capital. While actual cash is on the lower end of the spectrum, we both own stock portfolios that we plan to use as collateral for our banking operations. Our current holdings include Berkshire Hathaway (NYSE: BRK-B), Johnson & Johnson (NYSE: JNJ), Procter & Gamble (NYSE: PG), and Coca-Cola (NYSE: KO).

For the purposes of this application, we are choosing to mark these assets to model rather than to market. Our basic assumptions include 7% U.S. GDP growth, 12% global GDP growth, a 4% U.S. unemployment rate, rising corporate profitability, U.S. debt repudiation, and the end of cloudy days.

In addition, Matt owns a home in Las Vegas. Though this asset is currently considered "under water" based on market valuations, a house down the street just sold for slightly more than Zillow.com said it was worth. We extrapolated that gain into infinity and determined the housing bust is simply a figment of the media's imagination.

Now the good news: Without getting into the complexities, our models show our combined net worths at just over $1 billion, all of which we'll use as capital for Money Unlimited. We hired a 22-year-old right out of college who's pretty darn good with Excel. He assures us it's a conservative figure.

... continue reading: http://www.fool.com/investing/general/2009/11/20/an-open-let...