The Ten Principles of a Neo-liberal/Socialist-Democratic SocietySubmitted by tsmk on Sun, 05/27/2012 - 00:14
This is more of a spoof alternative to Dr. Paul's original Ten Principles but all credit goes to the original post by "Independent Pursuit" in the comment section of the original forum topic. I just decided to tweak it a little:
1. Everyone makes the same amount of money (except for government bureaucrats, who are given more lavish and generous rations, because they know what is best for you)
2. Every endeavor/venture must have the same amount of races/ethnicities/sexual orientation/gender to it. No exceptions.
3. You have free speech, as long as what you say is in compliance with the politically-correct regulations of governmental departments/cabinet offices.
4. Religion is banned, because it does nothing but cause conflict. Government knows best. Government answers your problems, believe in Government only.
5. Every citizen has a right to and is guaranteed government-approved: food products, fluoridated water access, shelter, clothing, disease-management services, formal schooling services, cell phones, TVs, cooking appliances, regulated internet, TSA monitored transportation, plastic surgery, etc.
6. Eat your vegetables. It's the law! Any food with a fat content over 0 can not be consumed.
7. Open borders, anyone can come and go as they please automatically obtaining full tax-levying citizenship and future access to an insolvent entitlement system. However, new immigrants must live at least 50 miles away from elected leaders. The only thing they are good for is votes (so they can't live in my backyard).
8. Citizens are to be monitored for all activities involving the emission of CO2 (that includes respiration) with a specific government-determined limit per household in the name of environmental preservation. Exceptions can be made for large enterprises that can afford to pay heavy carbon-taxes and abide by self-lobbied, government regulations.
9. If you try to move your wealth offshore to avoid taxes, you will be executed for treason.
10. All media must be in compliance with all rules and regulations of government departments/cabinet offices. That means no dissent. Also all TV shows and movies must have an equal representation of all races and ethnicities and lifestyles. For example, for every TV sitcom featuring a heterosexual family, there must be one featuring a homosexual family, a bisexual family, and an interracial family. And every sitcom family must have at least ONE(1) homosexual child.
(11. Self-defense is prohibited under all circumstances. No object may be used as a weapon against an attacker or one will be targeted as an insurgent. When in distress call for federal authorities.)