The Benton/Romney negotiations probably went something like this...Submitted by empireisalwaysevil on Fri, 08/24/2012 - 16:09
Benton: Our contributors are getting wise that we screwed them over and sold out to you guys. You gotta throw us a bone here, otherwise my gravy train will derail.
Romney Campaign: You really are a pathetic little worm, aren't you? As much as I enjoy watching you squirm, I won't make you beg this time. Here's the deal: You allow us to run roughshod over the rules and deny your grandfather-in-law delegate majorities in five states, thus preventing him from ever being nominated. In return, we will give you a sop to keep Paultards moneybombing new additions to your McMansion. How does a tribute video sound?
Benton: Hmmm. I don't know. Let me call Trgyve and see what he thinks. [Jesse rings up Trgyve Olsen, asks his advice.]
Trgyve Olson: I think it could only help Rand's future prospects in the party. Remember, we are playing the long game. It's very sophisticated. Only the most savvy of politicos (like yourself and Jack Hunter) could possibly understand it. Remember, it's all about Rand's tomorrow, not Ron's today. Never forget that. NEVER forget that.
Benton: Thanks for the advice, Trgyve. First rate, as always. What would I do without you?
Trgyve Olson: We do make a great team. I'm here whenever you need me, Jesse. You know that. [Trgyve hangs up, chuckles to himself, then breaks out into song: "Tomorrow, tomorrow, I love you, tomorrow, you're always a day away..."]
Benton: Well, I guess a tribute video is better than nothing. I'll take it!
Romney Campaign: As always, it's a pleasure doing business with you, Jesse -- EXCEPT for that mailing list of Paul contributors you sold us! We're carpet bombing each contributor on the list with 3 to 5 mailings per day and, so far, we've gotten bupkis in return. You took us to the cleaners on that one.
Benton: Caveat emptor, but it's not as if you didn't get other value from that exchange.
Romney Campaign: Very true, Jesse. You are the gift that keeps on giving.
Benton: I hope I've shown you that I am a good RepubliCAN team player. Say, might Mitt have a job for me in his campaign or administration? I think I deserve one for all the good work I've done on his behalf, don't you?
Romney Campaign: Sorry, Jesse. Mitt values loyalty in his staff above all else. Blind, stupid, unthinking loyalty. Lemming-like, if you will. That's why Mitt likes to surround himself with mainstream Republicans. You know, the kind who'll mindlessly follow anyone with an "R" next to his name no matter where he leads them, even if it's over a cliff?
Someone who would sell out his own grandfather-in-law (and his legion of loyal supporters) for chump change is not the kind of person Mitt wants working for him. You are too much of a petty grasper, even for Mitt, and that's saying a lot. I suggest that you crawl back into whatever hole it was that you slithered out of. You're of no further use to us...or anyone else, for that matter.
Oh, and please give our regards to Trgyve next time you see him. Tell him President Romney has a very special mission in mind for him come January. Real cloak and dagger stuff. Right up his alley, but way above your pay grade. Strictly "need to know." I'm sure YOU understand. *wink* *wink*