70 votes

The Fed is so sorry, but the gold is wet. You can't see it.

http://www.businessweek.com/articles/2012-11-04/about-that-g...

I am copying the top reply here:

"Louis Nardozi, Yesterday 07:28 PM

How can someone whose job is to investigate be so phenomenally stupid? The issue isn't whether the gold is THERE, or whether it has been adulterated. Those are straw men, deliberately brought up to mislead questioners.

The issue is, WHOSE gold is the gold that's 'there'? Is it owned by one person, or do a thousand have claim to the exact same bar? We're all certain Germany's gold is IN there - the question is, can they get it back out? Doesn't look like it, they best they can do is get a paltry 50 tons a year when they 'have' thousands here. Has it been promised as collateral? Has it been leased? Is it part of a gold swap - those same gold swaps that the FED says doesn't exist but that they have also denied FOIA requests about?

Calling something a 'conspiracy theory' when it is incontrovertible fact is just further proof of the abysmal quality of this 'reporting'. Who are you shilling for, Summers?"

Well said, Louis!

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FYI - little known fact, but

FYI - little known fact, but west and east was mixed up in the original wizard of oz map. IE the wicked witch of the west was on your right hand side.

Must be the wicked witch of the right. I have a suspect even now.

And for the support of this Declaration, with a firm reliance on the protection of Divine Providence, we mutually pledge to each other our lives, our fortunes and our sacred honor.

Adults knew little then ... & seemingly the same today.

Children knew where the witches lived.

    The original Wizard of Oz is actually less dark and scary than the movie. The wicked witch is barely a character at all in the book. A bizarre problem with the book is that the original map was printed backwards, with E reversed with W, making things hard to follow as you read along. The good thing about the Baum books is that they break from European--Brothers Grimm traditions and establish an American Idiom

Read more: http://www.towleroad.com/2012/07/oztgap.html#ixzz2BQKqH1CU

Disclaimer: Mark Twain (1835-1910-To be continued) is unlicensed. His river pilot's license went delinquent in 1862. Caution advised. Daily Paul

Some other possible takeoffs based on Wizard of Oz trivia

The shoes in the original book were also silver, not ruby.

A possible take off of the shoes might be based on Baum's third book, the Scarecrow of Oz, where Baum wrote " “Then mebbe they're - they're - What do you call 'em, Cap'n Bill? Something 'bout the Pilgrim's Progress, you know." "Bunions," said Cap'n Bill. "Oh, yes; mebbe you've got bunions" (The Scarecrow of Oz, Chapter 3).

Since bunions are what you get on the soles of your feet (and Dorothy seems to represent the soul like the tinman, scarecrow, etc) represent something, maybe there is something here for what the shoes are (and why the color change from silver to ruby). Possible takeoff line - "Well blimey, That's a shoe of a different color, that is".

The Wizard of Oz book and movie themselves have several things that seem to be taken from Pilgrim's Progress - there is a witch in Pilgrim's Progress too - but she is Madam Bubble (sortof like Glinda appearing in a bubble in the movie), and there is an enchanted ground right before you get to the celestial city (instead of emerald city) that Madam Bubble is in charge of.

And for the support of this Declaration, with a firm reliance on the protection of Divine Providence, we mutually pledge to each other our lives, our fortunes and our sacred honor.

You are too funny.

Thanks for the hilarious bumps!

Love or fear? Chose again with every breath.

So are you!

Everytime I see your title: "The Fed is so sorry, but the gold is wet. You can't see it." I laugh out loud! I think it was one of the first titles that caught my eye this morning and it was a pleasant surprise in the midst of all the campaigning posts.

I have even clicked on it a 2nd time today and I laughed again as I read the words from Mark Twain.

Laughing is good :)

New York Gold Vault Tours are Free. 45 minutes. Start 11:15 M-F

Schedule your tour including the gold vault here:

http://www.newyorkfed.org/aboutthefed/visiting.html

Translators welcome.

German tours subject to additional terms & conditions.

ADVISORY: Due to the aftermath of Hurricane Sandy, all guided tours and self-guided visits are cancelled until further notice. Though Sandy continues to work for the NY Fed, she will be put on administrative leave as soon as she completes her assignment shredding records.

Please monitor your local weather reports for bulletins about rainbows & pots of gold.

Disclaimer: Mark Twain (1835-1910-To be continued) is unlicensed. His river pilot's license went delinquent in 1862. Caution advised. Daily Paul

Will there be any free samples?

Perhaps some panning allowed?

deacon's picture

sampling of lead is frowned upon

even painted with the gold paint :)
deacon

If we deny truth before your very eyes,then the rest of what we have to say,is of little consequence

I am a bit slow

but you made me laugh! No lead samples...only lead boots.

deacon's picture

lead will do that

and i imagine a cause for weight gain
but his type of panning will make
one slower too
http://library.thinkquest.org/J0111742/Trepanning.htm
don't try this at home kids :)
deacon

If we deny truth before your very eyes,then the rest of what we have to say,is of little consequence

Trepanning...

...I'm not laughing anymore!

"I work for the Fed; but, Gold Tours are not my fault." - Sandy

[A gaggle of reporters pepper NY Fed employee as she walks briskly down Liberty Street, attempting to arrive on time for work.]

Sandy, NY Fed: Yes, I work for the NY Fed; but, please don't blame me. I don't know anything about gold stored here. ... I know the NY Fed offers free gold vault tours. ... Please, I'll be late for work... I am a hard working girl... I shred records... Lot of overtime... More than that... I get blamed for a lot of mischief that goes on here; but, blaming me for trouble with gold tours is a bit of a stretch. Us employees that work here aren't even allowed to wear gold jewelry. ... Even silver is frowned upon... I'm really sorry... No. I have to clock in... Please, let go of my watch. It's not gold & it's mine. Let go!

[NY Fed guards approach.] ...

Disclaimer: Mark Twain (1835-1910-To be continued) is unlicensed. His river pilot's license went delinquent in 1862. Caution advised. Daily Paul

A 4th Laugh!

Please let go of my watch ... that is too funny :) I can't believe no one else has upvoted this one yet!

My son is recovering from the flu has asked me why I am laughing.

German tourists arrive @ NY Fed for scheduled Gold Vault tour.

Last line of this forum's linked news article:

Ordinarily, you’d be able to eye the gold bars yourself. Some 25,000 visitors tour the bank’s vault each year. Those visits, the bank says, have been canceled indefinitely “due to the aftermath of Hurricane Sandy.”

[Cardboard sign advertises free NY Fed Gold Tours.]

Ticket Hawker in front of NY Fed: NY Fed gold tour! Free! Take your look before the Germans take theirs! ... Gold Tours! Free! ... McIntosh! Galoshes! Weather gear! Stay clean & dry... Sandy, rain or shine.

Yes, Ma'am. Tour starts here. Uncle Ben there will give you a ticket. It's free. Tours start every 45 minutes. Schedule posted on that sign. First tour starts 11:15 sharp Monday - Friday. Closed for Bank holidays.

Sandy wasn't really a Hurricane by the time she got to work here. A bit stormy... She's really a nice gal.... Works in shredding department... Hard worker.

        NY FED GOLD TOURS
        ~Every 45 minutes~

    Next Departure time: ☑ Canceled indefinitely - see Sandy

[German Tourists w/ delegation tickets & cameras arrive. German Tour Leader presents gold tour reservation tickets.]

German Tourist group leader: Wenn sich unsere deutschen Tour starten? Sir, wenn sich unsere deutschen Tour starten? Sir, ich habe schon unsere Tickets für meine ganze deutsche Delegation. Wo sollen wir noch warten? Nein, die Königin von England ist nicht mit uns unterwegs. Sir, wir können nicht ewig warten! ... Sir! ... Sir, ihr nicht verlassen bis sie unsere Fragen beantworten! Wir kamen aus Deutschland. Wir müssen unser Gold! ... Sir, hier her kommen! Kommen wieder!

[Awful German Language translation roughed out by Mark Twain]

German Tourists w/ delegation tickets & camera: When does our German tour start?

Sir, when does our German tour start?

Sir, I already have our tickets for my whole German delegation. Where shall we wait?

No, the Queen of England is not traveling with us. Sir, we cannot wait indefinitely! ... Sir! ... Sir, your not leaving until you answer our questions! We came all the way from Germany. We must see our gold! ... Sir, come back here! Come back!

[NY Fed Gold Tour Hawker scurries down Liberty Street w/ German tourist in hot pursuit.]

        To be continued...

Disclaimer: Mark Twain (1835-1910-To be continued) is unlicensed. His river pilot's license went delinquent in 1862. Caution advised. Daily Paul

Ahhh... was this the point of

Ahhh... was this the point of the storm? Everyone was calling the US on its gold and now it is off limits indefinitely due to the storm.

You almost couldn't write a

You almost couldn't write a scipt any better.

And the Sliver is G O N E

http://www.dailypaul.com/261689/silver-dimes-silver-quarters...

Will we find the Silver with the gold? What happened to the nickel and the copper?

Why is the Fed printing so much paper.

Who got the gold wet?