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I Am Adam Lanza’s Mother

Gawker: Three days before 20-year-old Adam Lanza killed his mother, then opened fire on a classroom full of Connecticut kindergartners, my 13-year-old son Michael (name changed) missed his bus because he was wearing the wrong color pants.

"I can wear these pants," he said, his tone increasingly belligerent, the black-hole pupils of his eyes swallowing the blue irises.

"They are navy blue," I told him. "Your school's dress code says black or khaki pants only."

"They told me I could wear these," he insisted. "You're a stupid bitch. I can wear whatever pants I want to. This is America. I have rights!"

"You can't wear whatever pants you want to," I said, my tone affable, reasonable. "And you definitely cannot call me a stupid bitch. You're grounded from electronics for the rest of the day. Now get in the car, and I will take you to school."

I live with a son who is mentally ill. I love my son. But he terrifies me.


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This story

sounds like propaganda. In any case, I personally do not believe that Adam Lanza had anything to do with the alleged shooting at Sandy Hoax and there is no evidence to establish that he did.

I am not trying to be an ass here

but this sounds like the biggest crock of crap I have ever read.

Look at all the agenda points. She covered them all.

Here's the problem - YOU SUCK AT PARENTING.

This line sums it up - "On the intake form, under the question, "What are your expectations for treatment?" I wrote, "I need help."

Notice she put "I" need help???

There's your problem lady - IT AINT ABOUT YOU. This is the first sign she is a bad parent.

Maybe she should have wrote - Michael needs help.

"When I asked my son's social worker about my options, he said that the only thing I could do was to get Michael charged with a crime"

OR perhaps you could just pay for his treatment - just saying. You don't need a social worker - just stroke a check lady.

Sorry - but this whole article boiled my blood.

The human

mind is the most complex thing on the earth. The differences in two individuals are mind boggling so any comparison to Lanza is laughable. This person likely has absolutely nothing in common with Lanza except from the farthest and foggiest distance away. We have no real details about the upbringing of either of them. This kind of article only allows people who would rather not think about these people as highly unique individuals to ask questions such as "what do we do with these kids?", I suspect that an impotent and misled law would be suggested. That's for he and his family to decide since they and their doctors are the most qualified to do so. If he were to break into my house one night in some sick rage, well then I can give you a solid answer on how I would handle him. Get out the mop.

"Endless money forms the sinews of war." - Cicero, www.freedomshift.blogspot.com


... get the fuck out of my business my child's education and anything whatsoever regarding my religion my family or my money ::: GET THEF UCK OUTof MYlife

fucking socialist pigzzzz

I truly despise this article.

I truly despise this article. "Mental illness" is inevitable when a parent can't handle their child..."I love my son but he terrifies me," what a joke.

A single mother with a

A single mother with a drugged up kid. Enough said.

Now there is: I Was Adam Lanza


Exercise Your Rights. If You Don't Use Them, You Will Lose Them.
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I suspect...

that the authors psychological issues are at the root of the child's behavior, threatening to kill him self at 13, where did he learn to use self harm as a bargaining chip?

I wouldn't be surprised if his mother has a Cluster B personality disorder, probably Borderline or Histrionic.

Even if she is completely mentally healthy, the way she dealt with him isn't going to help him one bit.

Check out the Laissez-Faire Journal at LFJournal.com

"The State is a gang of thieves writ large." - Murray Rothbard

There is

anti human propaganda all around us.
Music, Movies, TV in general.

You would have to imply that this mother is wrong for Not Making Them Go Without Electronics Indefinitely.

Don't forget the effects of Vaccines and corporate GMO food that is depleted of vital nutrients. Oh, and the fluoride and cocktail of anti depressants in the tap water (in most places).

Ron brought the Liberty movement together, Rand is expanding the crap out of it! :)

Who are you

To judge the mother? Have you ever dealt with a child such as that? I highly doubt it.

Ron Paul - Intellectual hero

Everyone with a child has dealt with a child like that

it starts around two years old(they dont call them terrible twos for nothing)

The difference is, some of us actually took our parenting responsibilities seriously and corrected these behaviours throughout childhood - hence turning them from the animal we all are - and instilled in them morals and values - which is what makes us civilized. Starting at two and going on and on.

IF this story is even real - which I doubt - there are sure fire signs that she just sucked at parenting
1."I recently accepted a position with a local college, giving up my freelance career because when you have a kid like this, you need benefits" Umm- actually - when you have ANY kids you need these - its called responsibility - and freelancing - by definition is not a career.
2."On the intake form, under the question, "What are your expectations for treatment?" I wrote, "I need help."" The use of the word I here is telling - clearly it is about her - not the child - probably been like that a long time.

I could go on and on.


Either this woman is a literary genius with a firm grasp on how to express feelings/emotions/descriptions or this story is nonsense.

"I can wear these pants," he said, his tone increasingly belligerent, the black-hole pupils of his eyes swallowing the blue irises.

In a story like this you really don't need to know that his pupils were swallowing his blue irises.

Was the purpose of this to incite emotion or educate others? I'd say it's the former, not the latter.


That is my first response.

My second? I thought Adam Lanza's mom was dead, shot by her own son.

Third: I will not see all this blame cast on one person. All my buddies in law enforcement, well, they cried the hardest because there's this guilt thing: WE SHOULD HAVE BEEN THERE, IF ONLY WE COULD HAVE BEEN THERE, WE SURELY WOULD HAVE BEEN THERE.

Any one of us would have gladly given our lives in this case to prevent what happened. Without a second thought and with no thought to outcome.

But with this sense of guilt and BURDEN, this is our attempt to take responsibility. To in fact share this burden, this guilt, this culpability. No. As parents it's almost like when one of us fails we are all at fault. And it's down to all of us, especially those of us who live, that we try. And try we will. Try to figure out where we failed, try to figure out how to do better next time.

Now everybody wants to chrystalize this into pro gun or anti gun but just hold off on that for now. If you feel this burden you know it's more of a "how can i personally intervene in somebody's life and prevent the next Jared Loughner or Adam Lanza and this is where the rubber meets the road: will you care now or put it off to next time?

Our combined influence as a movement is unmistakable, we are changing the course of history RIGHT NOW but we are a movement of individuals and it's this power that pushes us to the top. I don't know how else to say it but to say that I AM PARTIALLY CULPABLE FOR THIS WORLD AND THAT IS NOT A BURDEN I WOULD SEE LAID ON ONE OVER-WORKED FEMALE IN A NICE HOUSE IN CONNECTICUT.

I never met Adam Lanza and now I'm sorry for that. I am his father, his brother, his cousin, his uncle and I'm sorry I wasn't a friend when he needed it.

Most of those who think so actually don't and most of those who think sew actually rip.

this story may or may not be real

and the mother may or may not be acting good in our opinion and if you think this type of thing doesn't happen then you are kidding yourself.

Do you think a child just wakes one day and loads a gun and kills?

It starts from years of junk food and that includes the time the child grows in the mother's womb. When all else fails (all they have tried) they visit the doctors and are given drugs and that adds more mess to the body.

Have any of you noticed that a child (or adult) when having trouble resorts to junk food?

I'll bet a dollar that the food (Michael not his real name)craves is junk food.


How do you know?

Anybody who has this kind of reaction clearly has ZERO experience with a mentally ill or autistic child.

Mentally ill people are WITHOUT reason. And there is no logical basis or proof that mental illness is caused strictly by environmental factors. In fact, most research says otherwise.

Ron Paul - Intellectual hero

Completely CONTRIVED BS -

Completely CONTRIVED BS - please note the transparent demonizing of white males - photo of blond blue eyed boy - (finger in the butterfly to frighten white woman). I know you all see the pathetic pants metaphor, he wants to wear the pants but his are the wrong color... it goes on and on. Pathetic. Also, to give credit others even at the liberal sites have caught on to this fictionalization.

Why are people taking this woman seriously?

The fact that she would use her real name and include her son's real life picture in the same post where she calls him a future mass murderer should be a *huge red flag* that this woman is not a model of sanity of herself. When you read her post with a healthy dose of skepticism, the whole story sounds like a textbook case of Münchausen Syndrome by proxy.

I didn't read so much that

it was "fake" as that the mother seems to have a history of writing about her son on her blog in questionable ways (with this particular post going viral); and that she has been repeatedly criticized for what she has written by some other blogger, who has accused her of not only exploiting her children to get sympathy but, it would appear, some mental issues of her own. In any event, I'd agree that it lacks credibility.

When we try to pick out anything by itself, we find it hitched to everything else in the Universe.
~ John Muir


Sending him to public school and probably feeding him whatever drug the doctor tells her to. Stories like this make be very angry at the Pharma lie.

Love or fear? Choose again with every breath.

The story is too well crafted

to be a knee jerk reaction to the Sandy Hook events from the mother of a distraught teenager, imo. Especially a single mom. Since when did single moms become so brave and articulate at a moment's notice?

It could be a clever distraction.

If I tell you that "I am Ron Paul"

would you believe me? Well I am not, but when his ideas live inside of us we say that. I think that is what the author meant.

~Your perception becomes your reality~

Ah... I got what

the author meant. It is clear as crystal. Bright and shining, in fact. Perhaps even a modern day "A Modest Proposal."

And that's why I am skeptical. It is just a little TOO polished. Read it carefully; there are some very finely-tuned phrases for an off-the-cuff blog post. But more than that, how many single moms would rush out onto the field of battle and proclaim themselves mothers of the enemy soldiers?

For me, it doesn't ring quite true. It is up to you to make your own judgment.

Dr. Phil or The Dog Whisperer

I have learned so much from watching Dr. Phil and the Dog Whisperer.

I don't have a dog or a child, but I see others making the same mistakes over and over again, and the problems, for the most part, have pretty simple solutions, starting with parents (and pack leaders) taking a good hard look at what they're doing.

What do you think? http://consequeries.com/

It's not always the parent's fault

Dr. Phil wouldn't have a clue about what to do with some of the kids I have dealt with. He has the luxury of ending the show with simple advice and a referral to a therapist that the television station will pay for. Off camera, the therapist has to do the heavy lifting and that's the messy part that you don't see.

I agree that there are many parents who need to learn to a thing or two, but there are also kids out there that would give the most gifted super nanny absolute fits.

‘Each individual is separated from others by a "taboo of personal isolation"...this "narcissism of minor differences"'
--Sigmund Freud

Michael's behavior

occurs at almost ANY middle or high school in America on almost ANY given day. Teenage angst has been reinforced and empowered by parents, by teachers, by administrators, and by school board members.

When will we require completion of parenting/discipline classes of every parent before they can even enroll their child each year in public schools?

I know something about this problem; I've been teaching in a public high school for ten years now. It's been an eye-opening experience.

Mental illness is real

Granted, there is no reason for the Federal government to get involved in mental health care or any other forms of healthcare, but that doesn't mean that mental illness is not real or that it is always the parent's fault. As a psychologist, I can guarantee that Dr. Dobson and most of the people here casting stones wouldn't have a clue about what to do with some of the kids that I have dealt with.

As Dr. Paul has said so many times, liberty brings people together. We don't have to insult others and be divisive in order to fight for liberty.

‘Each individual is separated from others by a "taboo of personal isolation"...this "narcissism of minor differences"'
--Sigmund Freud

This story sounds very

This story sounds very similar to a family I know. Their son does things like the kid in the article. He's spent a few weeks at a mental treatment facility, been arrested a few times, has grabbed a knife & made threats when he doesn't get his way, etc. Now he is in a treatment program & does take some sort of meds. They say he has aspergers & some other issues.

I believe a significant part of what caused his issues was bad parenting. From when he was 2-3 years old he basically was taught, by the actions of his parents, that he did not need to obey or respect them. They taught him, through their own actions, that if he persisted to disobey and that if he resisted significantly enough that he would get his own way, and he always did.

That's what he learned from his parents who did not insist that he both respect and obey them.

I mentioned back when I first saw a minor incident, where the mother indirectly taught him at a very young age that he is the boss & not her, that if it continued he would be a terror to them when he was a teenager. And he sure has terrorized them many times since.

He's a good kid, friendly & smart. But he becomes a nutcase when he does not get what he wants.

In a way it's probably not his fault. His parents indirectly taught him to be that way and now their entire family is paying the price for their lazy parenting throughout his younger years. Now they are quite proactive about it with him getting treatment & such, but that I believe is probably just because they really have no choice now.


What is causing this mental breakdown of sooooo many of our

youth? This question needs to be studied, debated and defined. All of those youth with problems will some day grow up to be adults. Do they then pass this on to their children? Is it genetic? Is it in the food we eat or the beverages we consume? The water? The immunizations? As the aunt of one of these troubled youth who is now an adult, I can tell you that they HATE themselves because they know that they are not right. They have no training on how to live with their illness. Oh yes, we can put all kinds of restrictions on guns. It is probably inevitable that there will be some kind of restrictions. However, we, as a society, need to address this issue of mental illness. It is all so very, very sad.

~Your perception becomes your reality~

You might wish to

compare the ages of most of these kids with the timing of the rise of cocaine abuse in this country.

There are no politicians or bankers in foxholes.