36 votes

Buy Me Some Candy Or I'll Hold My Breath Till My Head Explodes

Some friends of mine created a child.

They have been caring for and meeting the needs of this child since the moment it was born.

The child used to be very well behaved. But lately it has been acting out - making unreasonable demands, attempting to undermine the authority of its parents, taking liberties.

And it isn't just a terror to its parents. All of the neighbors have seen the child act out by damaging property and making threats but are in no position to do anything other than inform the parents of the sins of the child and hope for the best.

Perhaps worst of all is the fact that the child's excesses have become so grandiose that most behaviors that would otherwise be deemed inappropriate are accepted for the sake of keeping the peace.

The situation is getting worse every day, and it doesn't seem likely that the child is going to change its ways on its own. The last straw may fall at any time and it's a really tough call whether or not reconciliation can be found. If not handled correctly the cold war might go hot.

The child has already demonstrated that it is willing to do nearly anything it can to maintain its position of power over its parents. It has even inflicted wounds on itself as a tactic to gain more control.

Is there a solution?

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Major announcement: The kid just got himself a new bike...

He started smashing his toys and throwing his video game controller at the tv, causing several hundred dollars in damage.

I saw the best minds of my generation, destroyed by pandas starving hysterical naked

-Allen Ginsberg

You know chris

This is a seminal point.

The scenario as is being played out is that the house is only willing to feed the gov't but they won't eat unless they are promised desert and new toys as well.

The house has so much power they never use. This is the first time that the house has used this power since I started paying attention to politics. Unfortunately they still want to fund most everything else.

See in my eyes, the house is the breadwinner. If they dont like something its their call. Period, end of story. That's the way the American people should view it.


Michael Nystrom's picture

Has his head blown yet?

At this stage, waiting for self destruction might be the best option.

All art is only done by the individual. The individual is all you ever have, and all schools only serve to classify their members as failures. E.H.

Emergency update - the kid locked himself in the house...

4 days into a siege - all the doors are locked, the windows have been boarded over, and he's been tearing the faucet handles off and throwing them out on the lawn:



I saw the best minds of my generation, destroyed by pandas starving hysterical naked

-Allen Ginsberg

Give it 9 minutes...

on the news hour info program???

I saw the best minds of my generation, destroyed by pandas starving hysterical naked

-Allen Ginsberg

Revoke its posting privileges

Revoke its posting privileges =)

aww... that's sweet!

Thanks for the attention. Could I loan you some money?

I saw the best minds of my generation, destroyed by pandas starving hysterical naked

-Allen Ginsberg

Maybe later, right now I'm

Maybe later, right now I'm being paid millions by Obama to discredit conspiracy theories =)

Kill the little bastard and start over.


Hey Larry - Is this one of those metaphors?

Why I think it is Clem...

I saw the best minds of my generation, destroyed by pandas starving hysterical naked

-Allen Ginsberg

when a kid

is out of control I've heard you sometimes have to beat their ass so they will listen to you. If the kid is bigger than you than I've heard beating them in their sleep can help

This child has also

taken the parents credit cards and charged them up to the limit, borrowed against their retirement account, pawned all their belongings, even bought a new 84 inch flat screen tv for him and his buddies to watch not even allowing the parent to see it.

He is currently calling cps to tell them they beat him and defenseless animals and they should come take all the belts. (Before the parents find out how broke they really are.)

It looks like

the subject of discipline has already been covered so it might be helpful to look at nutrition next. The digestive tract plays an important role in the mental balance of a child. Excessive sugar can drive kids crazy. Check out Dr. Natasha Campbell-McBride's videos on the link below. She talks about toxicity and the role of healthy gut flora in health, The program is similar to the traditional diet that the Western Price Foundation addresses, though more restrictive in that it cuts out bread. (Includes: Soup stocks, fermented foods & beverages, healthy fats--raw butter, raw sour cream, etc.) She healed her own son's autism and has helped thousands since.

Her book is called "Gut and Psychology Syndrome: Natural Treatment for Autism, Dyspraxia, A.D.D., Dyslexia, A.D.H.D., Depression, Schizophrenia."

GAPS™ (Gut and Psychology Syndrome) Nutritional Program - Dr Natasha Campbell-McBride

Put said child over knee (face down),

and apply adult hand to childs bottom, twice, using a short, sharp smacking motion. Send child to room. Once the tears have subsided, and using as few words a possible, tell child that that type of behavior is COMPLETELY unacceptable, and a sore bum will be the consequence of further misbehavior. Kiss tear stains, give a heartfelt cuddle, and let the child come out of room when ready.
Works EVERY time.
The toddler you have, is the teenager you will get.You have been warned!

Yeah, I'm sure violence will

Yeah, I'm sure violence will help the child.

Seriously though, children like this need to be forced to think for themselves. Encouraged to GROW UP mentally and emotionally. A little shunning might even work. When I say shunning, I mean ignoring them when they act out. I even like the idea of exhausting the child with arguments or debates about why they do something that's so stupid.

(EDIT) I want to elaborate about violence. I think kids that start hitting people, can be hit back. We're not pacifists, we're for non-agression. So if the child starts physical aggression, that can be met with some physical aggression in order to get them to stop. I've done it before and it works and is fair. However teaching children that to disobey your commands means physical aggression seems to counter everything we stand for.

The Horse Whisperer rides wild horses.


Free includes debt-free!

Best solution...


Calm Assertive Energy

Maybe I've been watching too much Dog Whisperer (for someone who hasn't had a dog since 1965), but I think the "calm" part is critical for success, because anger is a sign of weakness.

What do you think? http://consequeries.com/

egapele's picture

Excellent analogy. The parents unwittingly trained the child

to act that way. Self-centered behavior had successfully been used by the child to get what it wanted and it is the parents' fault, not the child's.

They were too busy focusing on other things (i.e., the TV, their own wants) to nip the problems in the bud and only paid attention until the behavior started affecting their lifestyle.

If the parents choose to change things, then with enough diligence, steadfast willpower, and backbones made of steel, over time they can retrain the child to be quite happy living within the impenatrable boundaries lovingly set by them.

The next battle is maintaining the boundaries, which WILL be tested. Phew!

Lets assume you are

using this story to describe an illegitimate ruling class. Not a child. First, you set boundaries (Constitution). Second, you defend boundaries. Third, by being responsible and refusing to allow them through the boundaries, you create a better relationship with these individuals. There will be peace, for awhile. Soon, another nasty group will arrive and test your boundaries. Defend them again and around we go. Giving in and allowing them to act like petulant little children is irresponsible and will result in YOU becoming their servant.

My younger brother had an extremely strong will.

When he was four (I was deathly sick at the time, lying on the floor waiting to go to church) he for no apparent reason “slammed” me in the forehead with a metal pair of fold-up field glasses. Dad seemed to instinctively know what he had to do. He spanked my brother until he finally apologized. My brother was a different person with a different attitude. He & Dad had a great relationship after that.

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my sister hurt herself one time

she banged her head against the wall, my dad said "oh you want to hurt yourself let me help you", he then grabbed her head and shoved it into the wall again. she stopped hurting herself after that. Some times you have to have the attitude you want it you got it.

The head is sacred

Your sister's behavior was unacceptable as she could've caused permanent injury or death to herself. A parent is responsible to put a stop to unacceptable behavior immediately.

But even if your father was using restraint, the possibility remains that he could've permanently injured or killed her.

He could've chastised her and made her think very seriously about ever trying to injure herself again without touching her head or risking her well being.

Did he ever mention having any regrets for acting that way?

Glad your sister did stop hurting herself and that she was okay.

I am for peace: but when I speak, they are for war. Ps 120:7
Better to be divided by truth than united in error.
The local church(not a building -a people) is the missing link. The time to build is now.

Piece of wisdom

I like the saying I've heard from African parents talking about their well-disciplined and hard-working children: 'We will kill them before they kill us.'

Please visit my site for more information about my libertarian book. Thanks!

Yes there is hope.

These parents sound like most devoted parents today -at a loss for understanding that children must be trained and how to go about that.

If the parents are willing to follow instructions, the child is completely redeemable.

Questions: Age of child? Homeschooling family or? Is the child on any psychotropics yet? How desperate for answers are they? Are they willing to receive instruction on childrearing from the Bible?

I am for peace: but when I speak, they are for war. Ps 120:7
Better to be divided by truth than united in error.
The local church(not a building -a people) is the missing link. The time to build is now.

My tactic with brats...

"If you are going to make me miserable then we are both/all going to be miserable together."

Everybody just sits in the same room with nothing to do. Meals become rudimentary and bland (crackers and water maybe). All media devices become dormant. Maybe some books are allowed. If the kid want to act out then the kid acts out. But we all just sit in the same room. Eventually the boredom becomes overwhelming and requests for a truce/compromise are eventually proffered and accepted -- on the condition that the Great Boredom might return at any time.

It worked for me... :p

~wobbles but doesn't fall down~

Late Term Abortion

(Post-adolescence) to save the life of the mother (father and extended family).

Termination of the sort I have in mind is the most pro life solution... And responsible. Remember it's been said, and I'm paraphrasing, 'supporting the political class (taxes and such) is like giving whiskey and car keys to teenagers'.

So we are clear (since the word terminate has such negative connotations, as does abort, particularly among our crowd), I don't wish to see violence in the classroom, neither real nor portrayed. Weaning should be enough to let nature take its course.

What, exactly, are you

What, exactly, are you suggesting?

Arrested Development ...

... with extreme prejudice.


abort⁠ -- verb ⁠\ə-ˈbȯr

b : to stop in the early stages


No longer a child, but a sociopath bent on harming others.

Rotten to the core and incapable of reform, it's reign of terror will only end when it destroys itself through its own destructive behavior, either by pushing others to act with defensive force or at its own hand by route of sheer recklessness.

Check out the Laissez-Faire Journal at LFJournal.com

"The State is a gang of thieves writ large." - Murray Rothbard