How To Profit From ByteTurds Part 1Submitted by FreedomsReigning on Sat, 04/06/2013 - 01:01
The biggest knock against BitCoin is that it represents nothing of value, and since we're creating currency, why would somebody trade something for nothing? Without government force, I wouldn't accept BitCoin in trade nor would I accept Federal Reserve Notes. When asked about BitCoins failings the typical BitConner will tell you about how each digital token is "mined", implying that something of value was created by productive human labor.
That makes about as much sense as saying BitCoins are created each time you brush your teeth in the morning. The rest of us DO appreciate it, but we wouldn't pay you to do it. BitCon is doomed to fail. We all see it coming, and even the most rabid BitConner will tell you: "Watch for BitCoin 2.0!"
So, I thought I'd introduce you to it early. I want you BitConners to stay one step ahead of the rest of the digital currency scammers. Yep. You guessed it. What I'm talking about is the latest monetary innovation that's sure to sweep the nation: ByteTurd!
ByteTurd; think BitCoin, only better.
ByteTurd will use the existing framework created by BitCoins, but instead of pretending value was created by some obscure form of digital "mining"(lol), each digital ByteTurd will be created by actual human labor.
This is how it works:
For every one of my steaming turds an Anarchist eats, I will create one digital ByteTurd (Trademark Pending) and transfer it into their digital wallet.
Think of it as my favor to you as an Anarchist. What this means is that all the newly created money will start its journey in your wallet, and from there, it will circulate around within the free market.
I wouldn't trade anything for a BitCoin, but I would offer you something of value for a ByteTurd. I would know that some Anarchist worked hard for it, and I'd know other people would recognize the value represented by each ByteTurd.
I'd also know that ByteTurds can only be created so fast. Even in my wildest dreams, I could only create about 15 or 20 ByteTurds a day. That means they'll hold their value. It'll be nearly impossible for me to debase the current supply of ByteTurds.
It's simply good monetary policy.
Why bother with Greenbacks and BitCoins when you can have a direct line into the scam? Only an Anarchist can create ByteTurds, and the rest of us will consider an Anarchist eating a turd the 'base value' backing up each ByteTurd in circulation. It's brilliant. Finally! A sound digital monetary system.
Not only that, ByteTurds will be something you can actually hold in your hand. Yep, I said it, REAL MONEY.
Just like with Federal Reserve Notes, ByteTurds will exist in both a purely digital form along with paper notes and exchangeable ByteTurd coins. Each ByteTurd will be represented by a unique and encrypted numerical code which can be transferred digitally from wallet to wallet, or in the case of hard ByteTurd currency, the numerical code will be taken out of digital circulation, and thus only traded by means of hard currency. In essence the hard currency will become that numerical code which represents each individual ByteTurd.
Each ByteTurd dollar and coin will have a mark of authentication which you can scan using a simple Iphone app to check and see if it's a legitimate ByteTurd. Just think of it, a thick stack of ByteTurds you can fan out in your hand. Money money money MONEY: MONEY!
On the face of each Byteturd coin, you'll find a beautifully rendered portrait of an Anarchist spooning excrement into their mouth. You'll find an "A" tattooed on the maniacal Anarchists forehead along with a Guy Fawkes mask pushed back from his face into his disheveled hair.
On the tails side of each coin, you'll find a picture of an American Patriot, wearing a tri-cornered hat, squatting down, and filling a paper plate with fresh ByteTurds.
It's fool proof, and born from something we can all recognize as representing value. So get in early. Get em while they're hot. ByteTurds, for the man who demands their currency represent something of value.