45 votes

Yo mama is so statist...

I am accumulating a list of the best "yo mama is so statist" jokes. Please submit your best jokes below! Here are some examples:

Yo mama is so statist you aren't allowed to play with legos without a building permit.

Yo mama is so statist she charged you a carbon tax for mowing the lawn.

Yo mama is so statist you went to summer camp at FEMA.

Yo mama is so statist she broke her own windows to stimulate the economy.

Yo mama is so statist she brings old tax forms to H and R Block hoping they will find a mistake so she can write another check.

Yo mama is so statist she gave birth to you on a road.

Yo mama is so statist she applied for a food license just to make you a sandwich.

Comment viewing options

Select your preferred way to display the comments and click "Save settings" to activate your changes.

Yo mama is so statist...

that she snitched you out to the cops for rolling through a stop sign.

Check out the Laissez-Faire Journal at LFJournal.com


"The State is a gang of thieves writ large." - Murray Rothbard

Yo mama's so statist...

Her one criticism of Obama is that he's just not quite enough like Hitler.

I'm reaching up and reaching out.
I'm reaching for the random or what ever will bewilder me.
And following our will and wind we may just go where no one's been.
We'll ride the spiral to the end and may just go where no one's been.
Spiral out.

Yo mama is so statist that

Yo mama is so statist that she exclusively buys GMO products because she thinks it means Government Mandated Organism

Yo mama is so statist that she has mandatory TSA pat downs when entering her car

Yo mama is so statist that she thinks Castro is a capitalist pig

Yo mama is so statist that she named her three sons Barack, Bernanke and Bloomberg, she affectionately calls them the 3 b's

"If ye love wealth better than liberty, the tranquility of servitude than the animated contest of freedom — go home from us in peace. We ask not your counsels or arms. Crouch down and lick the hands which feed you. May your chains sit lightly upon you, an

Yo mama is so statist...

She makes you deposit your allowance at the FED.

Yo mama is so statist she

Yo mama is so statist she baptized you at the lincoln memorial reflecting pool.

Yo mommas so statist

Yo mommas so statist she wrote a prisonfood cookbook.

Yo mommas so statist... just look at her first baby picture http://www.counterfeitchic.com/Images/BeenInside_Oh_Baby_Lon...

Yo mama is so statist

She sings you The Star Spangled Banner for a lullaby.

She makes the whole family pledge allegiance to the flag at mealtimes.

She named you after her favorite President: Woodrow.

She files a complaint against herself with the EPA every time she breaks wind.

Recommended reading: The Most Dangerous Superstition, http://www.amazon.com/Most-Dangerous-Superstition-Larken-Ros...

Yo mama is so statist...

She made you get an occupancy permit just to have a sleepover.

she thought her vegetable garden should qualify for a farm subsidy.

(tipping the DMV is my favorite so far)

Yo mamas so statist, she

Yo mamas so statist, she believes Obama deserved his Nobel Peace Prize.

Yo mamas so statist, she divorced your daddy to marry the system.

Yo mama is so statist...

Yo mama's so statist that her religion is public school.
Yo mama's so statist that she fluoridates her armpits.

Yo mama's so statist...

She said Jay Carney was her favorite news anchor since Robert Gibbs.

I'm reaching up and reaching out.
I'm reaching for the random or what ever will bewilder me.
And following our will and wind we may just go where no one's been.
We'll ride the spiral to the end and may just go where no one's been.
Spiral out.

Yo mama is so statist...

she let the village raise you

=======
RON PAUL 2012

Yo mama's so statist...

She got her social security number tattooed across her forehead.

I'm reaching up and reaching out.
I'm reaching for the random or what ever will bewilder me.
And following our will and wind we may just go where no one's been.
We'll ride the spiral to the end and may just go where no one's been.
Spiral out.

Yo Momma's so Statist,

she calls Newt Gingrich her SugaDaddy.

Yo Momma's so Statist, she believes Frothy's sweater got a certification from OSHA.

Yo Momma's so Statist, when you call shotgun, she throws you a bikelock.

Yo Momma's so Statist, when you asked about the birds & the bees, she got a PhysEd waiver from your Principal, before taking you to the BunnyRanch!

Yo Momma's so Statist, when you asked for an iPod for your 12th b'day, she printed out a copy of DMCA with Robert Wenzel's treatise on IP: "Stefawn, Stefawn, I'm gonna destroy you Stefawn!"

Yo Momma's so Statist, she thinks HuffingtonPost isn't the National Enquirer.

Yo Momma's so Statist, whenever she hears "UFOs," she thinks "ooh goodie! More FAA taxbase!"

Yo Momma's so Statist, she calls PETA to euthanize her dog.

Yo Momma's so Statist, she prints out a copy of DiFi's AWB, as she's being mugged.

Yo Momma's so Statist, when Chris Rock called Obama "OUR daddy," she ordered a paternity test, for her.

Yo Momma's so Statist, when you say "I just won the state lottery!" she says, "congrats, on your 5th welfare baby!"

Yo Momma's so Statist, she has Bill Maher on her Cougar Thursdays speed dial.

Yo Momma's so Statist, she throws her panties at Paul Krugman.

Yo Momma's so Statist, she gasms to Obama's fake unemployment figures.

Yo Momma's so Statist, when DHS knocks on the door, she asks 'how far should I spread 'em?'

Yo Momma's so Statist, TSA porn-gropes are the most action she got, since having you.

Yo Momma's so Statist, whenever she hears "semi-auto," she thinks it's a setting on her FDA-approved vibrator.

Pardon the potty-mouthed Monday lunch break!

Predictions in due Time...
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zGDisyWkIBM

"Let it not be said that no one cared, that no one objected once it's realized that our liberties and wealth are in jeopardy." - Dr. Ronald Ernest Paul

Yo momma's so statist she

Yo momma's so statist she arrested her 6 month old for loitering.

Yo mommas so statist she put her mugshot in her family photo album.

In light of the MSNBC video

Your Mamma is so statist, she gave parental rights to the Neighborhood Association.

"In the beginning of a change the patriot is a scarce man, and brave, and hated and scorned. When his cause succeeds, the timid join him, for then it costs nothing to be a patriot."--Mark Twain

Yo mama is so statist she

Yo mama is so statist she drives you into the ghetto part of town and makes you play with the poor kids.

Yo mama so statist, every

Yo mama so statist, every child after her first was named EIC #1, #2, #3, etc..

Southern Agrarian

Yo mama...

Yo mama is so statist she charges you capital gains tax on your weekly allowance.

Yo mama is so statist she spends her vacation days as a volunteer for the IRS.

Yo mama is so statist she helped lobby for Monsanto in the budget bill.

_____________________________________________

Watch this dry yet astonishing Dr. Robert Beck cancer treatment lecture on Google Video - search "Suppressed Medical Discovery" - http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MkiX0jJJozk

tasmlab's picture

Your momma is so statist

Your momma is so statist that she always votes democrat, except when she votes republican.

Your momma is so statist that she thinks sound money is banking by phone.

(my favorite so far is the one "she breaks her windows to fix the economy")

Currently consuming: Harry Browne, Free Domain Radio; JT Gatto and Holt; Wii U

Yo mama's so statist...

she signed over her parental rights to the entire community because "it takes a village".

I'm reaching up and reaching out.
I'm reaching for the random or what ever will bewilder me.
And following our will and wind we may just go where no one's been.
We'll ride the spiral to the end and may just go where no one's been.
Spiral out.

Yo mama so statist

Yo mama so statist she gave you a SNAP card for your 18th birthday.
Yo mama so statist she calls the EPA every time she changes your diapers.
Yo mama so statist she thinks aspartame is a vitamin.
Yo mama so statist she pasteurizes her own breast milk.
Yo mama so statist she sent you to your room forever, for no reason.
Yo mama so statist she waterboarded you just to find out if you ate her Milky Way.
Yo mama so statist she spent 5 hours walking around the grocery store looking for the goverment kool-aid.

these are fun to come up with

LMFAO!

Omgomgomg, the breast milk, that just about killed me! XD

I'm reaching up and reaching out.
I'm reaching for the random or what ever will bewilder me.
And following our will and wind we may just go where no one's been.
We'll ride the spiral to the end and may just go where no one's been.
Spiral out.

Yo momma is so statist

she hands out 1099 forms at her bird feeder.

There is nothing strange about having a bar of soap in your right pocket, it's just what's happening.

Yo mama is so statist she

Yo mama is so statist she made you register your toy guns.

Yo mama is so statist she made you fill out a form before teaching you to read and write

Yo mama is so statist she reported you to the government for crying when you saw Obama.

Your mama so statist gives u a W2 for your allowance.

Your mama is so statist she tips at the DMV.

Your mama so statist she gets ooff from TSA pat downs and wants to shake dat thang.

Your mama so statist she pats everyone down at th entrance to your house.

Your mama so statist puts on a uncle sam costume and a strap on and fscks ur dad out of half his money on april 15th.

Okay this is getting graphic

Yo mama is so statist

Yo mama is so statist that she makes you write wishlist letters to Uncle Sam for the 4th of July

"If ye love wealth better than liberty, the tranquility of servitude than the animated contest of freedom — go home from us in peace. We ask not your counsels or arms. Crouch down and lick the hands which feed you. May your chains sit lightly upon you, an

Yo Mama i so statist...

She only had you to collect extra wellfare benefits.

Too far?

We all share this eternally evolving present moment- The past and future only exist as inconsequential mental fabrications.

Nope.

Yo mama is so statist she only had you to give the government another taxpayer.

Recommended reading: The Most Dangerous Superstition, http://www.amazon.com/Most-Dangerous-Superstition-Larken-Ros...

Double Post

Double Post

We all share this eternally evolving present moment- The past and future only exist as inconsequential mental fabrications.

care to link?

jussayin..

'Peace is a powerful message.' Ron Paul