The Parable of Mario and LuigiSubmitted by BILL3 on Wed, 09/18/2013 - 01:06
One day Mario was walking along and bumped into Luigi. Their eyes met, a sparkle glimmered and they became conscious beings.
Experiencing the sudden rush of thrill that comes of free will, they shook their limbs for the first time, and took in a breath, and an idea struck Mario.
"I will climb up to the top of that row of floating bricks, and bump my head on that high up brick we could never reach before, because now we will work together. It is human nature to headbutt bricks to gain our daily sustenance, to continue the struggle for existence against turtles, hammer throwing lizards, and fire breathing koopas. And you, Luigi, you will help me, because social cooperation is the foundation of our mutual survival in that struggle, and the basis for all forward human progress."
Luigi listened, was confused and scratched his head, but he gave Mario a boost and Mario bumped out an odd mushroom they had never seen before, and this one caused some really freaky sh1t.
Suddenly lost in a fuzzy warm spiraling maze of colors, love and Zen, Mario lost all desire to jump upon goombas and flatten innocent turtles, overcame his instinctive nature and sat upon a stone.
Pondering eternity for many hours in the wilderness with nary a mushroom or star to sustain him, he saw to the bottom of things, and he became Scientific.
As he contemplated the expansive world around him, in all the glorious forms and shapes of the two dimensions, he seethed with joy at the glowing, buzzing energy of the universe.
He saw past the temporary and temporal, and reduced all things to those fundamental constants of nature and the material building blocks of the world. Pixels of color and line, and the engine that allows bodies to move and interact.
Luigi naturally sat and listened to what he had to say.
Mario made numerous experiments and calculated that the speed of gravity of a falling body in 2 dimensional space is always X acceleration.
He explained the mechanics of jumping from a running start and from a position of rest.
He expostulated on the effect of the falling body of a man onto that of a goomba moving or at rest.
He identified the fundamental colors and shape of pixel that are the building blocks of the world.
Much did he explain to Luigi, and Luigi asked him where Mario World came from, and what caused those building blocks and laws to come into being.
Mario laughed and scoffed at his simplicity.
He said it did not come from anywhere, it is the ultimate reality, there is no such thing as nothing, the laws of Mario World are a given, the only possible state of things, and do not require explanation, cause or beginning.
Luigi protested, but Mario interrupted. Every time the GAME OVER is reached, the game starts anew. End follows from beginning in an endless holy loop, uncaused, ceaseless and eternal. The energy that created the world pulsates from an infinity of possible quantum states. It powers the universe and makes time tick, uninterrupted, beyond cause or effect, fundamental to the reality of all existence. Nothing else could be conceived, and the idea of nothing is no more comprehensible than a third dimension.
Mario assured him everything makes sense, and Luigi chewed his cud and ruminated.
He scratched his head once more, submitted to the power of Mario's overwhelming reason, and he too became Scientific.