14 votes

secrete plots for the confoundment of the humorless on Daily Paul

This post is where I go when my personal brain farts need to, er, manifest themselves. Has that ever happened to you? If so, post it below and see for yourself that nobody cares!

I'll start!

Monsanto Introduces Whacker-Resistant Weeds

The strain can only be killed with Monsanto's new Ground-Up° herbicide.

Free samples of seed currently being air dropped over homes and farms in Iowa and all surrounding states.

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I had to walk all the way here,

And my legs are soar like an eagle.

AUM

Congress debates where to dump surplus bombs

Sudan, Syria and Sudetenland all being considered.

Don't feed the pandas. Ever.

If you are secreting plots

you may want to see a doctor about that... it sounds kinda gross.

I just keep secreting and secreting...

●●•••

Don't feed the pandas. Ever.

ChristianAnarchist's picture

I had that once... Very

I had that once... Very painful.

Beware the cult of "government"...

child places firecracker in toilet

Completely unanticipated behavior stuns community

Don't feed the pandas. Ever.

New bear spray app protects user from bears

Don't feed the pandas. Ever.

Green Bay Packers sign Joe Berger mid-play

Don't feed the pandas. Ever.

Hawaii raises surf conditions to

Hurricane yo.

Don't feed the pandas. Ever.

New renters and landlords encouraged to take lots of selfies at

start and end of residency

Don't feed the pandas. Ever.

I have a few questions.

I would hate to be deemed incompliant. (Is that a word. Hmmm... noncompliant, uncompliant...)

Anyway:
1. Together or seperately?
2. With or without clothing?
3. Do we send them to the NSA ourselves... or will they collect them automatically?

Thanks for helping me maintain my complacency.

Just make sure any damage is in the selfie...

This will help settle disputes come security deposit time.

Don't feed the pandas. Ever.

Merck Media launches new TV series 'Everybody Loves Floboxicin'

To debut in coveted 2:30 am time slot

Don't feed the pandas. Ever.

report: gays now easier to identify than the blacks

Coming up next - Puerto Rican laborers taller than expected

Don't feed the pandas. Ever.

Obama: I will turn off the sun if a debt deal is not reached

Obama to Turn off Sun if Debt Deal not Reached

Donned in grass skirt and festooned with baubles, president Obama addressed Congress today, waving his spirit stick in an ominous manner and threatening to turn off the sun if his budget proposal isn't passed by the next full moon...

Obama on the throne
.....

Don't feed the pandas. Ever.

St. Louis Rams sign first openly black gay man

Pass rusher said to be light in the cleats.

Don't feed the pandas. Ever.

Western Union to sue Eastern Bloc for infringement of Trademark

Claim name too closely resembles theirs.

Don't feed the pandas. Ever.

America changes motto to 'hey your entitled to your opinion

man.'

Don't feed the pandas. Ever.

2 and a 1/2 Broke Girls beat out We are Mental

Death.....

Don't feed the pandas. Ever.

Nation Elects 44th White President

Don't feed the pandas. Ever.

Government Holds 'Going Into Business' Sale

Promises thousands of new state prison jobs

How to not be a troll accidentally.

Don't feed the pandas. Ever.

Economic Crisis Looms as Nation's Thin Air Supply is Depleted

The thin air out from which the United States' money supply is printed is facing supply shortages, and may trigger a collapse as reserves run dry, according to sources within the local Associated Bank, over by the free coffee.

"I tried to buy some thin air the other day for my sister's birthday but the balloon lady said they were all out" said the source who will remain anonymous as we never asked their name.

The thin air supply is protected by the National Thin Air Reserve and since 1927 has been controlled by the Thin Air Control Act due to its usefulness in cryogenics, war, and good times at parties.

Don't feed the pandas. Ever.

Hadn't seen this one.

Nice work.

Séamusín

methlife insurance company declares bankruptcy

Blames Flaming Spider Epidemic

Don't feed the pandas. Ever.

Long-Awaited 3rd 'World War' Series Installment Slated for

Summer '14 Launch

Don't feed the pandas. Ever.

President's Kickstarter campaign falls short

... 'Make me president' misses $100,000 goal

Don't feed the pandas. Ever.

Party Names, Logos Viewed as Racist, Offensive

in other news:

Will Government Shutdown Affect Planarian Research?

Obamaphone Bill May Go Unpaid Due to Budget Constraints

Weather Channel Opens Complaint Department

Starter Bell Peal to Replace Starter Pistol for 2016 London Olympics

Congressman Realizes He Left His One-Hitter Back at his DC Office

Don't feed the pandas. Ever.

Obama seen with Boehner

Obama seen with Boehner entering a Car Title and Pay Day Loan branch in Alexandria, Va shortly after negotiating debt ceiling deal.

Southern Agrarian

'Millionaire' Transitions to 'True-or-False' Format

'Heads or Tails' debuts with 19 million viewers...

Don't feed the pandas. Ever.

Congress Seeks To Borrow Nation's DVD Collection

"We'll have them back in a few days" - statement

Don't feed the pandas. Ever.