A Guy Walks Into A BarSubmitted by bierdegarde on Thu, 10/10/2013 - 00:50
with a monkey on his shoulder, sits down at the bar and orders a beer. The bartender says monkeys aren't allowed and please leave. The man says I just want one beer the monkey will be fine. The bartender gives in and serves the man a beer. In the mean time the monkey jumps off the mans shoulder, goes to the pool table, picks up the cue ball and swallows it. The bartender is angry stating that was the only cue ball he had. The man says I'll be back in a few days after it passes. Sure enough the man returns 3 days later with the cue ball and the monkey. The bartender is grateful and offers the man a beer. The monkey then jumps off the mans shoulder heads to the buffet table, picks up a toothpick, stabs a meatball, sticks it up his butt, then eats it. The bartender is shocked and asks why the monkey did that. The man says, ever since the monkey swallowed the cue ball he doesn't put anything in his mouth unless he measures it first.