Who I am!Submitted by The Pen on Thu, 10/24/2013 - 17:34
Politics were not part of the repertoire within my family while growing up. However, the sometimes fanatical adherence to religion, namely Christianity abounded within my family as a child. I never got it! I tried to understand and see, sometimes to the strain of festering tears over my inability to comprehend such ideas. The only memory I have of politics finds me at the age 10, sitting in the family room with my parents and grandparents and a few other faceless bodies, watching the presidential inauguration of George H. W. Bush. I had no idea of the significance of this event and I cannot recall the emotions or reactions of my family at that time, but looking back now it is clear that many within my family surely voted for him some 25 years ago.
Possibly needless to say, I stayed far away from politics and religion most of my life until I found the teachings of Buddhism in college. I believe to this day that in the year 2002 I experienced enlightenment, or at least a shift or dimension that was overwhelmingly joyous and peaceful and that experience has followed me and stuck with me to this day. I don’t necessarily adhere to ANY teaching, religious in nature or spiritual in nature, BUT I practice what allows me to become a better man, father, husband and human being, which is definitely not devoid of the teachings I’ve been fortunate enough to discern for myself. I could have easily fell into the same Bible-toting, scripture quoting path that my Grandparents were known for, but try as hard as I could it was not the reality for me. I never felt the Holy Spirit after my baptismal ceremony, I never felt the presence of Jesus or the Lord God from the pews of the church and I could never understand the intolerance and outright despising of those who either didn’t conform or believe as they did or respect the same sexual ideologies.
Even at the age of 10 I was able to see the hypocrisy of those who claimed to follow the path of a tolerant and all-loving God. It was enough for me to disavow God for quite some time and to this day my beliefs regarding religion center more around Anti-theism and Anti-organized religion than anything else. I have no qualms with anyone practicing what they believe and feel, but the salesman-conversion tactics and fearmongering regarding eternal Hell-fire are quite foolish to me and I am unable to accept and indulge in such persuasions of threat. I cannot entertain Vicarious Redemption as the means to mankind’s salvation as it strips man of the capacity for self-reliance and self-responsibility for his/her own life. I would like to think that we are strong enough to provide for our own redemption rather than placing the collective and continual burdens of mankind upon the back of one figure of history. It seems quite selfish and traditionally apathetic.
I do not know where this is going but I like to think that my story can be appreciated here. And it continues on to about two years ago, when I first heard Alex Jones on television. He was part of a series concerning nothing less than “conspiracies”. As I listened to him speak something beckoned me to listen and attentively so and for the first time in my life all prior speculations, thoughts and doubts about government were honored with the words he spoke. I was no longer afraid to express my feelings and I owe so much of that to Alex, however rash and overbearing he can be. But the ultimate stick in my side came when the episode mentioned Ron Paul and the movement that was 2008. To say that I was oblivious to Ron Paul in 2008 would be an understatement. And yes, in 2008 I voted for “Hope and Change” in order to get the prior corruptor out of office, not realizing I was voting in his kin. This is how oblivious I was at age 30.
October 24, 2013 finds me at 35 years of age, married with two beautiful children. Over the past year I have written numerous letters-to-the-editor which have been published in three local newspapers. I have questioned with formal letter the inoculations administered by our pediatrician as posted here at the DP. I have taken it upon myself to make questioning a common practice and am teaching my son to do the same, even if it means questioning me. It is an interesting situation to find oneself in once you come forth on a public stage and voice your views of government, war, military and other “conspiratorial” ideas, such as GMO foods, Water Fluoridation, etc. Let me just say, I don’t speak quite as often with those who have read my views in the local publications and that is the most disappointing aspect of awakening. However unfortunate the isolation, I would be fighting my own conscience and morality by continuing to “go-along to get-along”. I CANNOT GO BACK! It is not just a choice any longer, it is a lifestyle I am compelled to seek everyday and it is non-negotiable. One can only become so disheartened before the change that compels one to speak out is upon them, God or no God.
I may never meet a single one of you, but I feel a connection with you all by the ideas and questions we harbor, raise and announce here at the DP. I am fortunate in this life to have come to my wits, even if after 30. Some never do. Some cannot handle it, therefore they may CHOOSE their apathy at the expense of those who have shed it.
Peace and Love always.