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Adulterers and Sorcerers Lobby Call For Phil to Be Re-Fired From Duck Dynasty

Members of the Adulterer's Society of Solidarity, or the assmen as they're known colloquially, issued a statement today calling for Phil Robertson to be fired again from his hit soap opera Duck Dynasty on ABC, for his hateful and offensive comments about them.

In their press release they stated "as C. S. Lewis said, when we made those vows to fidelity, we were only doing it to look good in front of all the attendants, to trick to our inlaws, and attain all the status gains of married life.

We never intended literally to keep to it. It is our natural impulse to have sex with anyone we are attracted to, and only a bigot or fool would expect we do anything other than indulge all of our immediate impulses at all times."

Some of those in the group were also proud boasters, and one stepped forward to say "We are rich, we are good looking, we are fucking bad asses. This is pussy shit!" and he spiked a Bible on the floor.

The Sorcerer's league was more subdued and taciturn in their response, and merely read from a big, old looking black book in an unknown tongue.

A small contingent of avowed idolators also turned out to show their solidarity and demand Phil renounce his outmoded monotheism, for they too are very sensitive as a people and offended by Phil's quoting of Romans.

Together they all agreed that the hateful portrayal of them in many New Testament Books demanded an apology from Phil personally, and made it known how their tolerance would just not allow them to put up with any dissent.

The three groups then jointly issued a demand from the Holy See and all other major Christians confessions to immediately convene a new council of Nicea, put aside their differences and enter a new communion, in order to excise all of the Paul authored books from the New Testament, and to take a more modern and enlightened approach to God's infallible commands. Or at least "just die already!"

Representatives from the fraternal order of gossips and backbiters were strangely silent.

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Definitions for ya

Intolerant: 1 : unable or unwilling to endure 2 a : unwilling to grant equal freedom of expression especially in religious matters b : unwilling to grant or share social, political, or professional rights
Bigot: a person who is or intolerantly devoted to his or her own opinions and prejudices ; especially : one who regards or treats the members of a group (as a racial or ethnic group) with hatred and intolerance
Ignorant: lacking knowledge or awareness in general; uneducated or unsophisticated.

Now I am sure you know the definitions of these words you so carelessly throw around. But none of these words define Phil Robertson or what he said in his interview. (You read it right?) At no point was he intolerant... He even said it was his opinion- about the vajayjays that is. He is not bigoted because he treated no one with hatred or intolerance. In fact he said he loves all people. And I would say he is a very knowledgeable and aware person. My humble opinion of course. My point is, these words don't actually express who this man is and the things he said.

Hiding behind religion? Come on dude. I get that you are not a religious person but for some of us folk, our religion is the most important thing to us. My relationship with God is the center of my life and his word is what I live my life by. And if God's word says something is a sin the. That is how I will treat it. Obviously the guy doesn't have much of a filter but what he spoke was truth. If you don't like it and are offended by what he says then you are offended by my God. And really that's your problem.

All this to say, I totally get what you are saying. That saying these things can hurt people's little hearts and scare them from the liberty ideals when they may have otherwise been attracted to it. But no way would I or anyone else in my position "be quiet" or keep our beliefs to ourselves because it might offend. That is the opposite of liberty. And there is nothing "ignorant" about these ideals. Throwing these harsh words around makes YOU look ignorant and offensive.

Just my 2 cents.

Glad you put a price tag on

Glad you put a price tag on your thoughts for us. Looks pretty accurate.

One more time I'll try to spell it out for ya.

1. Gays don't choose to be gay,
2. Expressing your belief that gays are sinners destined for hell when they act on their sexual desires is ignorant, mean and hurtful towards those who have no choice about their sexual desires, as well as to their sympathizers (which includes me).
3. Expressing your ignorance here associates it with libertarian thought, which, it is my hope, will continue to grow within the populace so as to lead to a freer century for my children and grandchildren.
4. Therefore, the expression of your ignorant, mean and hurtful "Christian" beliefs here will continue to be countered by me (and hopefully others who agree with me).

For freedom and liberty!

I must be willing to give up what I am in order to become what I will be. Albert Einstein

Silly wacko bird

Nothing that I said was ignorant Wacko Bird. I'm not ignorant to the gay rights movement rhetoric and the "I was born this way!" stuff. The same way my husband was born with a propensity toward alcohol because of an alcoholic mother, so people are born with a propensity to like people of the same sex. If my husband decides to drink himself silly he can't say "I was born this way!" That's just none sense. Believing in God and believing the Bible to be God inspired is not ignorant. And for a libertarian to say Christians should be silenced for the greater good of the liberty movement is hypocritical at best. I have nothing against gay people, I don't think I'm better than them. Heck I don't even care if they want to get married because it doesn't affect me. But I believe it is a sin. And they don't have to answer to me for that.

As a firm believer in NAP I'd

As a firm believer in NAP I'd never advocate that you should be silenced, only that, if you're truly interested in furthering freedom you should think seriously about silencing yourself.

I must be willing to give up what I am in order to become what I will be. Albert Einstein

EVERYTHING is a choice...and

EVERYTHING is a choice...and I do mean everything. Gay people just wont admit to it being a choice. Thats like me saying I didnt make the choice myself. I have had several opportunities to get into homosexual relationships over the course of my life...hell, I even considered doing so...but I didnt, I chose not to. I chose the women I dated and I chose the woman I married. Every day I choose to get up and go to work. Hell, I even make the choice not to look at women other than my wife sexually(yes..you can make that choice as well). I have nothing against those who choose to be homosexual, but to say its anything other than a choice is to lie. It makes a mockery of the word liberty. I control my body...it does not control me. I am responsible for every CHOICE I make in my life for good or ill. To say you dont have a choice is to say a rapist didnt have a choice in raping someone because he had a hard on....its a lie, and while you can lie to yourself all you please dont expect me to buy into your lie.

So you believe that gays

So you believe that gays choose their sexual desires? That they're actually attracted to women but choose men instead? Why would that be? Let me guess... Just to persecute Christians?

I must be willing to give up what I am in order to become what I will be. Albert Einstein

it's good to have what psychologists call ILOC

Internal Locus of Control

That's kudos to you. You will get a lot more done with an ILOC.

But, are you trying to say that we are all born with the same talents? If everything is a choice, then I can choose to be the next Michael Jordan, right? It's just a matter of hard work?

Do you have gay desires? How else would you know if being gay is a choice? And just because it is a choice for you, does that mean you can extrapolate to everyone else?

“Although it was the middle of winter, I finally realized that, within me, summer was inextinguishable.” — Albert Camus

This was supposed to be a

This was supposed to be a reply to WackBird but I'm not so brilliant at this site so forgive me...

funny

funny

Christians should not be warmongers! http://www.lewrockwell.com/vance/vance87.html

All humor aside...

I will prayerfully always agree with God on this and other issues, regardless of what ever the entire world might think of me for doing so.
I've more than a few " Gay " friends and family members, and as a extreme conservative Christian it is NOT MY PLACE TO JUDGE them. It is however my place to LOVE them regardless of their being in direct conflict with Gods written word. I also know " probation ", that being what is commonly called " the time in which mankind might choose to die to self and live in Jesus " is still yet open for ALL HUMANITY. I also know it takes God all of a nano second to completely change a human heart once that human sees the extreme nature of Gods love for them as individuals.

It's our responsibility as Christians to reflect that love, something that I struggle to do daily in my interactions with others.

I've two Christian friends who are presently within this issue, they both live each other, they love God, and I've watched them struggle with this...I know and have faith in Jesus that He alone can bring them into where He wants them to be. Just in the same manner Jesus has brought me into abiding in Him, which in my case meant leaving behind several MAJOR defects of Character such as alcoholism, drug addiction, womanizing, lying, being a major con artist just to name a few, but not all the character traits I had chosen to warp in my sinful nature.

We, and I do mean ALL of us are not born good, we are born with a proclivity to choose and to do what is wrong and harmful too us. We are, wherever we each are in life, but a byproduct of the choices we've made along lives journey: and every choice has consequence; good choices unto righteousness, bad choices unto death.

I Sincerly pray, during this season that is supposed to represent the birth of He who's love was to lay down His life so that we might not die the second death, that we each pause from trying to dictate to others the course of their lives and instead learn that to be worthy of having a Republic we must self govern: and only in Jesus can man achieve freedom from needing to be governed by others, at least it's been my observation and experience to have observers and seen no other method which bears lifelong fruit to that end.And the only attractive manner to encourage change in another, is by loving them until they can love themselves.

God bless.
Stēkō Parrēsia Iesōus

Drew, by the very grace of GOD through the blood of Christ Jesus.
"there shall come after us men whom shall garner great wealth using our system, and having done so shall seek to slam the door of prosperity behind them." George Washington

Wholly fukkin' sheet. Is

Wholly fukkin' sheet. Is there no end to you people?

http://m.youtube.com/watch?v=C5rJ4g9EMUk

I must be willing to give up what I am in order to become what I will be. Albert Einstein

I'd love to have a conversation with your adult...

Please look in the mirror and see if they are available?

God bless you.
Stēkō Parrēsia Iesōus

Drew, by the very grace of GOD through the blood of Christ Jesus.
"there shall come after us men whom shall garner great wealth using our system, and having done so shall seek to slam the door of prosperity behind them." George Washington

Steadfast you said much that

Steadfast you said much that sounds good, but all of your expression of good faith is ruined with this It is however my place to LOVE them regardless of their being in direct conflict with Gods written word.

Do you really have to express this hurtful opinion? Do you really have to express it here? Do you even understand that it is hurtful? Is it truly loving to express this opinion?

I must be willing to give up what I am in order to become what I will be. Albert Einstein

Truth is, you cause your own wounds.

Again, I'm not the Judge, God is. Thankfully for Humanity that same Judge of us all is also our defender in the person of Jesus.
I can not put this in terms you might understand, that I KNOW GOD IS, but I do beyond a shadow of a doubt. It's called having a intense personal relationship with Him based simply upon FAITH. That is I take God at His written word, His promise, His truth I have written in my heart.
Where you perceive injury is healing, where you cry abuse is freedom, where you call wrong is right: I am not ashamed of the truth in Jesus and it is better always to obey God rather than man.
Does a parent not reprove a child he loves, does he not place firm justice to prevent future ruin? Would you prefer a friend who let you get hit by the train over the one who pulled out your hair to help you avoid catastrophe ?
And what is so horrific that that I choose to love?

You confuse me, nevertheless

God bless
Stēkō Parrēsia Iesōus

Drew, by the very grace of GOD through the blood of Christ Jesus.
"there shall come after us men whom shall garner great wealth using our system, and having done so shall seek to slam the door of prosperity behind them." George Washington

I suggest that your confusion

I suggest that your confusion and our disagreement comes down to this...

In the Christian tradition that you espouse, homosexuality is a sin, and informing gays of their immenent exclusion from the kingdom of heaven is considered an act of love.

While I was raised in a similar (but not identical) Christian tradition and hold many of the same values as you, predominantly, libertarian principles guide my behavior today - chief among them, NAP. These principles are completely consistent with the Christian values that I have retained from my upbringing.

Homosexuality is not a violation of NAP (presuming consent of both parties), so as a libertarian I am tolerant of it - and perhaps more empathetic than most since I have a gay relative with whom I am close. I find "gays are sinners" comments to be hurtful to gays, and in the Christian tradition in which I was raised - where tolerance is a virtue - I would never say such a thing even if I believed it.

And from a political standpoint I am convinced that conservative/libertarian politicians associated with these sorts of comments start off at a severe disadvantage, so the comments are not only hurtful to individuals, they're damaging to the libertarian cause.

That's why I advocate that conservative Christians just keep "gays are sinners" comments to themselves - if not at all times at the very least when in the political arena,

Merry Christmas

I must be willing to give up what I am in order to become what I will be. Albert Einstein

I did not say being " gay " is a sin,

I did say that I agree with God that any unnatural sexual behavior, fornicating out side of marriage, adultery, beastiality, and like partnering ON MY PART would be a sin.
I clean MY OWN HOUSE, and frankly have far to much left to be rid of to be concerned with adjudicating others.
But if ASKEDwhat God says, I don't hedge, obfuscate nor lie.

The issue , once again, that you bring up is NOT MY PROBLEM, it's between you and God.
I'm not going to dislike you, nor treat you differently, or gossip about you, nor in any way stumble you NO MATTER WHAT YOUR PERSONAL issues between God and yourself are: but I will NEVER agree with you to people please you over pleasing God.

For me it is impossible to self govern outside of submitting to God.

God bless
Stēkō Parrēsia Iesōus

I pary you gave others thrice what you recieved, for the greatest blessings are in the free and unapplauded givings we grace others with.

Drew, by the very grace of GOD through the blood of Christ Jesus.
"there shall come after us men whom shall garner great wealth using our system, and having done so shall seek to slam the door of prosperity behind them." George Washington

two mallard drakes mating

How much duck hunting has Phil Robertson actually done? You would think he would have seen this sooner or later:


http://youtu.be/kYAte1RqC4Y

“Although it was the middle of winter, I finally realized that, within me, summer was inextinguishable.” — Albert Camus

is it possible that duck is

is it possible that duck is just retarded

BILL3

I love this guy! Too funny

A nation of sheep breeds a government of wolves.

A&E is female. Know how I know?

Because of how they ovary-acted.

heh heh...

Jen had known associations with pandas in college.

Vote for Sue. It's the right thing to do.

But seriously, sure, try to

But seriously, sure, try to laugh it off but it's actually positive that we have this debate now. This is one of those wedge issues that's inhibiting the growth of the liberty movement. Orthodox Christian liberty lovers need to understand just how awful their gay bashing sounds to many other libertarians, much less those only friendly to the movement but not yet fully on board.

If there's ever going to be an economically conservative majority again, those who hide what is perceived as bigotry behind the cloak of religion need to learn how important it is that they keep their beliefs to themselves.

I must be willing to give up what I am in order to become what I will be. Albert Einstein

Wow

How dare you to tell people to keep their beliefs to themselves? That wreaks of fascism.

Looks like your the one who has something to learn about liberty.

Okay, keep 'em to yourself

Okay, keep 'em to yourself only if you want a freer society. If you want more government control over our lives then feel free to offend every LGBT sympathizer. While you're at it why not go for offending all African Americans, Hispanics, and women while you're at it. I'm sure you can find something in your beloved scriptures to offend everybody. Have at it, my friend!

I must be willing to give up what I am in order to become what I will be. Albert Einstein

Faulty Logic

You have it backwards. People have the right to say whatever they want; whether it offends someone or not. You may have heard about it... It's called Freedom of Speech.

I'm offended by porno mags at the gas station but I would rather live in a country that allows them to be sold. It's up to the individual to decide whether to buy it or not.

If you don't understand this very basic aspect of human liberty, then you have no business posting on this site.

Of course you have the right

Of course you have the right to say what you want, that's not the issue and you know it. You're choosing to ignore my point because you have no argument and you know I'm right.

Gay bashing offends not only gays but many sympathizers. When libertarians support gay bashers - not their right to be bashers but the bashing itself - they associate libertarianism with being anti gay and turn off folks who might otherwise be open to liberty ideas and supporting liberty candidates.

I must be willing to give up what I am in order to become what I will be. Albert Einstein

Wacko Indeed

That is precisely the issue. Whether people are offended by another person's speech is not what's at issue. Whether you can say it is what libertarianism is all about. If you and other gay sympathizers don't like it... tough.

If you think the First Amendment is "no argument" then I repeat... You have no business posting on this site.

You say "you know I'm right." The only thing I have learned from this conversation is that your username suits you.

Check this gay lady out. Perhaps coming from her you will see the point...

http://www.breitbart.com/Breitbart-TV/2013/12/19/Openly-Gay-...

You've got to stand for something, or you'll fall for anything.

You've got to stand for something, or you'll fall for anything. You've got to be your own man, not a puppet on a string. Always do whats right and uphold your family name, you've got to stand for something or you'll fall for anything.

That is what Phil believes, and my God bless him for it. He can't be bought, that is why they hate him. What other celebrity has never caved when the media made up a 'Scandal' out of nothing?

Except it's not made up out

Except it's not made up out of nothing, the man said what he said and believes what he believes and stands by everything he said and reasonable non bigots find his comments ignorant and offensive.

I'm tellin' ya, until you Christian conservatives learn this truth we will never see an economically conservative majority.

I must be willing to give up what I am in order to become what I will be. Albert Einstein

Well Man

I have mostly avoided these threads. But the fact is, Phil is popular here in the South. The Bible is popular here, even if we don't live by it as much as we should.

Telling Christian conservatives to sit down and shut up, is not the answer in my opinion. You say he is an ignorant bigot? That is your right, but it brings no new people into the fold. If we even have a fold anymore. A lot of folks on this site won't even vote anymore.

Phil stood by his beliefs, I think what he said was crude, and so does his family. But if he said "I am so sorry, forgive me o' ye gods of political correctness!" would they have? No, everyone would hate him for different reasons. He would be a wimp, a squish, because he believes in what he said.

"Except it's not made up out of nothing" How so? It only matters if you think it does. Why do you guys care what he says, if you don't even like his culture. He is not running for office, he is a business man who has a VERY popular TV show because it appeals to normal Country Southern folks.

You know, the only 'Group' you are allowed to bash.

I'm a normal southern folk

I'm a normal southern folk myself, born and breed, so don't try to pull that woe is me southern prejudicial crap with me.

Phil's comments are resonating because they're intolerant. He called gays sinners, and his commentary suggested that he believes that gays have a choice about their sexual desire and are destined for hell if they act upon their desires. He's a gay bigot, and he hides his bigotry behind his religion.

His comments matter to me only to the degree that there are members of this libertarian forum who agree with his comments - not that he has a right to his ignorance (he surely does), nor that A&E is bowing to political correctness (they obviously are). But the fact that libertarians, and dozens of them on this forum actually agree with Phil, THAT is a problem for the liberty movement because if the liberty movement is ever going to achieve the critical mass necessary to make real change, it can't be associated with ignorance like Phil's.

Expressed beliefs like Phil's are the reason my state has to put up with the snake Terry McAuliffe for the next 4 years. If Christian conservatives just kept their ignorance to themselves we'd all be much better off.

I must be willing to give up what I am in order to become what I will be. Albert Einstein