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I Am Going Through My Second Divorce, Ten Years After The First.

My wife filed for it last week, after only five years of marriage.

The fact is I do have personal issues that have made her unhappy for longer than she can handle.

She is a mother and I am a father. We must give each other happiness, first, for our kids' balance.

I love her with all my heart, and I know she is still my friend because she is very supportive of me for my taking better care of myself.

As I want to save our marriage, I hope I will have been able to do it for myself and for her - in her eyes, in her recovered happiness - by the end of the 6 month cool off period of the procedure.

I am going to be off this site for a while.

Well ordered charity starts with and for self.

I love you all on here, good people, for your sharing in and for liberty.

Peace.



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Investment advisor and two-time

LP Presidential candidate Harry Browne was always fond of saying, to demonstrate how people are freedom lovers by nature, he never met a person who didn't want to make their own decisions, "even someone with two divorces and a bankruptcy."

Cyril I wish you well. My wife and I have had our ups and downs, but I love her dearly and don't want to live without her. If that is the way you feel about your wife, my best advice to you is to let her know that, not in a pleading manner, but in all your speech and actions.

Good luck!

What I have learned...

is men enter into a relationship hoping that the woman will never change and women enter a relationship thinking how can I change the man...lol...the guy upstairs continues to laugh!

"First they ignore you, then they laugh at you, then they attack you, then you win!"
GANDHI

"The belief is worthless if the fear of social and physical punishment overrides the belief."

TwelveOhOne's picture

Hope to see you soon here, friend

Sorry about your loss. I am among many others who miss you.

I love you. I'm sorry. Please forgive me. Thank you.
http://fija.org - Fully Informed Jury Association
http://jsjinc.net - Jin Shin Jyutsu (energy healing)

Cyril come back

some day.

Be brave, be brave, the Myan pilot needs no aeroplane.

Hope for the best

It's not over till its been through the courts.
So, if you want to try and save what you have.
My advice is....
1. Try to spend some time with just the two of you, whenever possible, I'm not talking about the bedroom, I'm talking about going for a weekend arts & craft show, concert, hiking, whatever???
2. Take her to the places where you felt really close to her, when she began to fall in love with you. (again, if possible).
Hopefully, this will rekindle her feelings and maybe she will reconsider.
3. Do NOT BEG...PLEASE, Just do not do this immature stuff, OK.
4. Be real and be yourself,...let her know how you feel and what you hope for your marriage.
5. Truly. Apologize for when you did wrong....if applicable.
6. Read the book..."The Marriage Builder"...by Lawrence J. Crabb Jr.
It is a good book on marriage...used by counselors, I think.
7. Do forget the old fashion stuff...you know "Flowers & Candy", Hey don't laugh...It works...sometimes.
8. Now, Get your butt in gear and go for it...My prayers are for you and the best...
9. P.S. You are one of the most likeable DP subscriber I know and I'm sure you have lots of friends here.
10. Oh yeah...Don't forget prayer.

Not a good plan!

Move on already!

Seriously...why are you

Seriously...why are you trolling?

Tell me, Kevin

Have you ever been married before?

Yes

When it's over, one will wonder why they tried so hard.

Divorce and Remarriage is Adultry

That is according to the Son of God. Mark 10: 1-12. Maybe he knows something you don't. Good luck.

Oh no!

Say something that might actually help him!

More on this topic

There is some dissent with that opinion, mainly over the word translated as both "put away" and "divorce" by the KJV in that Mark passage. This opinion, "Divorce and Remarriage is Adultery," puts the Messiah in direct conflict with Deuteronomy 24:1-4. To elaborate, imagine being a woman alive around 30 AD. You read the law. It said that if she 1) had a bill of divorce and 2) was departed out of his house, then "she may go and be another man's wife." Now, IF this law was changed around that time, and this woman had acted in good faith, remarrying according to Deuteronomy, should she be punished for that?

Here is a link that may help:

The Three Premises of This Study

1. Marriage is a conditional contract. We showed that [Yahweh] married Israel at Mt. Sinai and treated Israel as a married wife, until He divorced her (Jer.3:8) for insubordination and disobedience. If marriage were unconditional, then [Yahweh] could not have divorced her without tainting Himself with sin. Therefore, it must have been conditional.

2. "Put away" is distinct form "divorce." We showed how the Law mandates that a man must give his wife divorce papers before putting her away. One is the legal act of terminating the marriage; the other is the act of sending her away. This Law was set up to correct the historical injustice left by the loophole in the Hammurabi Code.

3. [Yahweh's] Law was not abolished. [Yahshua] said this in Matthew 5:17-19, Paul said this in Romans 3:31, and John defines sin in terms of violation of [Yahweh's] Law in 1 John 3:4.

You may disagree with some minor parts of this study, and that is your privilege. But if you find these three premises to be true, then you must agree that remarriage after divorce is not adultery.

More here: http://www.truthofyahweh.org/divorce.htm

.

Hear, O Israel: YHUH our God YHUH one. And thou shalt love YHUH thy God with all thine heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy might.

You maybe right, jruss133 and...

The Son of God got it wrong.

However, what is your authority? Have you ever given sight to the blind?

As for me, it is not hard to distinguish opinion from truth. Mark 10: 1-12 still stands and has for a very long time. Longer than you have been alive. God's only begotten Son is correct and you are in error, jruss133.

I could give you additional verses to help your understanding, but perhaps you should discover them for yourself. Afterall, firsthand knowledge is always the best. Good luck.

He got it right

As far as I can tell. My comment was to a possible mistranslation by us, not by him.

It would help if you could be more specific about the error I have made, and which verse says remarriage after divorce is adultery. It seems the mistranslation by the KJV is the word "divorced" in Matthew 5:32. That is the only place I have found in the New Testament where it is translated "divorced." In Mark that same word is translated "put away," and that is, I think, correct.

Mark 10:11-12 And he saith unto them, Whosoever shall put away his wife, and marry another, committeth adultery against her. And if a woman shall put away her husband, and be married to another, she committeth adultery.

"Remarriage after divorce is adultery...Mark 10:1-12."

Here you used the word "divorce" instead of "put away." Your paraphrase assumes the terms "put away" and "divorce" are synonymous. I have not yet evidence of that assertion, but I meant no offense.

.

Hear, O Israel: YHUH our God YHUH one. And thou shalt love YHUH thy God with all thine heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy might.

pa lease

You have to be kidding, right?

Third time's the charm

I like to be positive.

If Tyranny and Oppression come to this land, it will be in the guise of fighting a foreign enemy.
James Madison

Phxarcher87's picture

Darn

another one bites the dust. This is such a broken world.

THE CLASS OF CITIZENS WHO PROVIDE AT ONCE THEIR OWN FOOD AND THEIR OWN RAIMENT, MAY BE VIEWED AS THE MOST TRULY INDEPENDENT AND HAPPY.
James Madison

Cyril's picture

It's actually over.

I won't save it.

Nobody can.

"Cyril" pronounced "see real". I code stuff.

http://Laissez-Faire.Me/Liberty

"To study and not think is a waste. To think and not study is dangerous." -- Confucius

Before you completely give up,

please read this:

http://www.khouse.org/articles/1998/130/

You, your wife and children are in our thoughts and prayers.

"Hence, naturally enough, my symbol for Hell is something like the bureaucracy of a police state or the office of a thoroughly nasty business concern." ~~C.S. Lewis
Love won! Deliverance from Tyranny is on the way! Col. 2:13-15

I can save your next marriage

Don't do it again!

Sorry to hear about your marriage ending. It hurts but you will survive and thrive again! Keep breathing and keep moving as much as possible. Sitting around makes it all so much worse.

So sorry, Cyril. Just now saw your sad comment.

Your DP family is still here, ready to welcome you home. Keep faith with you as you move forward on the path of life. I hope you are back with us again.

“It is the food which you furnish to your mind that determines the whole character of your life.”
―Emmet Fox

It takes two

I've been married since 1976, my second marriage.

You both have to be committed to making this work. One person cannot do it alone.

I wish you both the best.

At least you don't have typhoid fever.

That's a plus.

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I am dusk icon. anagram me.

Marriage

Try marriage MENTORING, NOT counseling. It has about an 80% success rate!

You are still in control of your situation

Think for a sec at my condition.
The woman left me in the second month of being pregnant and I never saw even a photo of my daughter.

She is 11 now and all I know from the internet she is into gymnastics in Switzerland.

LL on Twitter: http://twitter.com/LibertyPoet
sometimes LL can suck & sometimes LL rocks!
http://www.dailypaul.com/203008/south-carolina-battle-of-cow...
Love won! Deliverance from Tyranny is on the way! Col. 2:13-15

I agree but...

wow...bummer...Don't know what else to say...except the twist and turns of life never end! I also talk from experience!

"First they ignore you, then they laugh at you, then they attack you, then you win!"
GANDHI

"The belief is worthless if the fear of social and physical punishment overrides the belief."

You want to save your

You want to save your marriage? Remind her why she married you in the first place. Marriage goes through seasons. Why would she give up after just 5 years.

About 8 years ago I almost made the biggest mistake of my life when I decided I wanted out. Luckily my wonderful husband is also very stubborn and refused to give up on me. God I don't know where I'd be without that man.

You sound

so weak. I feel sorry for you. Everyone should be able to stand on their own.

I would have missed out on

I would have missed out on the happiest days of my life if I left when things got hard. The ones who are weak are the ones who take the easy way out.

Good Luck

Usually, when someone files, they've already got one foot out the door and are at the point of no return.

Your children may still help you stay together but it will be rough waters ahead.

Also. It's cheaper to keep her.

________________________________________

Those who expect to reap the blessings of freedom, must, like men, undergo the fatigue of supporting it. ~Thomas Paine