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Friday Funnies :)

BARACK OBAMA: The chicken crossed the road because it was time for a change! The chicken wanted change! The chicken needed change! CHANGE!

JOHN MC CAIN: My friends, that chicken crossed the road because he recognized the need to engage in cooperation and dialogue with all the chickens on the other side of the road...

SARAH PALIN: BECAUSE, PRAISE JESUS, I WAS GONNA SHOOT HIS SORRY LIBERAL ASS OFF FOR BLOCKING MY VIEW OF RUSSIA !

HILLARY CLINTON: When I was First Lady, I personally helped that little chicken to cross the road. This experience makes me uniquely qualified to ensure right from Day One that every chicken in this country gets the chance it deserves to cross the road. But then, this really isn't about me.

GEORGE W. BUSH: We don't really care why the chicken crossed the road. We just want to know if the chicken is on our side of the road, or not. The chicken is either against us, or for us. There is no middle ground here.

DICK CHENEY: Where's my gun?

COLIN POWELL: Now to the left of the screen, you can clearly see the satellite image of the chicken crossing the road.

BILL CLINTON: I did not cross the road with that chicken. What is your definition of crossing?

AL GORE: I invented the chicken.

JOHN KERRY: Although I voted to let the chicken cross the road, I am now against it! It was the wrong road to cross, and I was misled about the chicken's intentions. I am not for it now, and will remain against it.

AL SHARPTON: Why are all the chickens white? We need some black chickens.

DR. PHIL: The problem we have here is that this chicken won't realize that he must first deal with the problem on this side of the road before it goes after the problem on the other side of the road. What we need to do is help him realize how stupid he's acting by not taking on his current problems before adding new problems.

OPRAH: Well, I understand that the chicken is having problems, which is why he wants to cross this road so bad. So instead of having the chicken learn from his mistakes and take falls, which is a part of life, I'm going to give this chicken a car so that he can just drive across the road and not live his life like the rest of the chickens.

ANDERSON COOPER, CNN: We have reason to believe there is a chicken, but we have not yet been allowed to have access to the other side of the road.

NANCY GRACE: That chicken crossed the road because he's guilty! You can see it in his eyes and the way he walks.

PAT BUCHANAN: To steal the job of a decent, hardworking American.

MARTHA STEWART: No one called me to warn me which way that chicken was going. I had a standing order at the Farmers Market to sell my eggs when the price dropped to a certain level. No little bird gave me any insider information.

DR SEUSS: Did the chicken cross the road? Did he cross it with a toad? Yes, the chicken crossed the road, but why it crossed I've not been told.

ERNEST HEMINGWAY: To die, in the rain, alone.

JERRY FALWELL: Because the chicken was gay! Can't you people see the plain truth? That's why they call it the other side. Yes, my friends, that chicken is gay. And if you eat that chicken, you will become gay, too. I say we boycott all chickens until we sort out this abomination that the liberal media whitewashes with seemingly harmless phrases like the other side. That chicken should not be crossing the road. It's as plain and as simple as that.

GRANDPA: In my day we didn't ask why the chicken crossed the road. Somebody told us the chicken crossed the road, and that was good enough.

BARBARA WALTERS: Isn't that interesting? In a few moments, we will be listening to the chicken tell, for the first time, the heart warming story of how it experienced a serious case of molting, and went on to accomplish its lifelong dream of crossing the road.

ARISTOTLE: It is the nature of chickens to cross the road.

JOHN LENNON: Imagine all the chickens in the world crossing roads together, in peace.

BILL GATES: I have just released eChicken2008, which will not only cross roads, but will lay eggs, file your important documents, and balance your checkbook. Internet Explorer is an integral part of eChicken2008. This new platform is much more stable and will never crash.

ALBERT EINSTEIN: Did the chicken really cross the road, or did the road move beneath the chicken?

COLONEL SANDERS: Did I miss one?

And now I'll ad mine:

RON PAUL: If a chicken wants to cross the road and provided it isn't endangering or infringing upon the rights of others, it should have the right to cross any road it wants.

Your turn! Have fun!

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Bill OReilly: I'm asking you

Bill OReilly: I'm asking you to shut up about chickens. Shut Up. I said, Shut....Up.

Michelle Obama

For the 1st time in my life I am proud of my chicken.

Thank you Dr. Paul for making me act on what I already knew was right.

*May the only ones to touch your junk, be the ones you want to touch your junk.*

Peter Schiff

That is one smart chicken.... Obvioulsy he does not listten to the talking heads, everyone should follow him across the road to the silver/stock up survival/shop and get crash proof!

Got to be my favorite!

Ron Paul: Well, I could see way the chicken wants to go to the other side, but I'm afraid he will just find more of the same. Unless he goes back to Constitution Street he is headed in the wrong direction.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"It is your duty as loyal Americans to Shut up."– Bill O'Reily

Mathew 5:9 Blessed are the peacemakers: for they shall be called the children of God.

Hahaha Don't wanna ruffle any feathers but....

Hank Paulson.... That chicken needs to be bailed out & bailed out quick or the whole world will fall down on it's head. Now be a good american & stop that illiquid chicken and throw him in the money hole....http://www.dailypaul.com/node/72963#new

Another one:

SEAN HANNITY: The chicken is a menace and the other side of the road should be destroyed to prevent it from achieving its goal of killing us – everybody wins.

"In the beginning of a change the patriot is a scarce man, and brave, and hated and scorned. When his cause succeeds, the timid join him, for then it costs nothing to be a patriot."--Mark Twain

Sean Hannity

Those freaks were throwing snowballs at me & chased me across the street.

But to set the story straight..... I'm NO chicken! Uh huh

Biden

JOE BIDEN: Look, I love that chicken. I’ve worked with that chicken. I’d take a bullet for that chicken. But, that chicken is insane and we should form a coalition and throw down spike strips to prevent him from crossing! Or – he’s running away from Scranton.

"In the beginning of a change the patriot is a scarce man, and brave, and hated and scorned. When his cause succeeds, the timid join him, for then it costs nothing to be a patriot."--Mark Twain

JOE BIDEN:

Mark my words. Mark my words. It will not be six months before the world tests that chicken. The world is looking at that chicken crossing the road. Remember I said it standing here if you don't remember anything else I said. Watch, we're gonna have an international crisis, a generated crisis, to test the mettle of this chicken. And that chicken is gonna have to make some really tough - I don't know what the decision's gonna be, but I promise you it will occur.

pretty funny!

won't add, I am not that creative... :) for the weekend.
!!!Truth is treason in the EMPIRE OF LIES!!!

" Single acts of tyranny may be ascribed to the accidental opinion of they day; but a series of oppresssions...pursued unalterably, through every change of ministers, too plainly proove delibrate, systematical plan of reducing us to slavery..."
Tho

You are creative... you just can't multi-task

and I suspect you are trying to lol.... love ya

How about this:

~Kirk Cameron (Fox News): The libertarian long-shot chicken is not from the "chicken party". He is a whack job and a racist and is not a real chicken. I would like to ask the chicken, "about fry-ability sir, do you have any?"
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"It is your duty as loyal Americans to Shut up."– Bill O'Reily

Mathew 5:9 Blessed are the peacemakers: for they shall be called the children of God.

CARL Cameron, not Kirk. LOL

CARL Cameron, not Kirk. LOL you had me thinking the guy from "Growing Pains" was working for fox!

Woops! Hahaha!

~
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"It is your duty as loyal Americans to Shut up."– Bill O'Reily

Mathew 5:9 Blessed are the peacemakers: for they shall be called the children of God.