I don’t know that I can do this anymore (UPDATE: because of you, I can)
None of you know me. I’m 38 years old, married with 5 kids, 4 still at home. I’ve been a member of the Daily Paul for 1 year 33 weeks. Before changing my profile a while back, I was shown as “pastorpaul” because that’s what I was, a Baptist pastor. I posted a few comments during the primary season over a year ago but mostly I visit the Daily Paul every day to inform and educate myself without ever logging in. I highly appreciate all of you who take the time to post all of your articles, thoughts and comments for the rest of us who don’t. You have greatly changed my life, starting with Michael Nystrom and other screen names I have come to know such as Jane Aitken, zenpiper, DaddyWarbucks, IMissLiberty, Dale In Oklahoma, SIERRAHPBT and so many others I can’t name them all. You all have enlightened me, encouraged me, provoked me and probably angered me from time to time. I’m glad you did.
When I say, I don’t know that I can do this anymore, I’m not referring to this wonderful online community. I will continue to come here virtually every day until my last breath, the site shuts down or there is no need for such a place on the web (I don’t see that happening ever). I can’t really explain what it is. I just feel that I can’t keep living like this.
Over the last year we have lost 2/3 of our income, both our cars, my father (my original hero) passed in February, my wife’s grandfather (who was like her father) passed three weeks ago and I now have to rely on food banks to feed my family. I have no investments outside of what the retirement committee does with the money they take from my checks. I don’t have gold or silver nor any money to buy some. I’m not looking for pity, I don’t deserve any. We did most of this to ourselves through our bad decisions living the false American Dream before I “woke up” (America Freedom to Fascism did it for me two years ago). My main hope now is that my children will listen to their father who they have witnessed make all these mistakes and never ever borrow money for anything, watch critically everything that the government does and vote Constitutionally with a clear conscience every time they have the opportunity.
I’ve lost faith in government, faith in “church folk”, faith in denominational religion and have suffered serious hits in my relationship with God. While still a pastor, after “waking up”, I decided that if I was going to call myself a Christian and say that I follow my God’s Word (the Bible) then it is my responsibility to know and study all of the Bible, verse by verse, book by book, one end to the other just as it is my responsibility as an American citizen to know and study the Constitution word by word from one end to the other (I’m still working on both). I began to implement this teaching style in my preaching and shortly after was told by Deacons of the church to change my preaching. They didn’t want to learn. They just wanted to feel good about their selves and their denomination as being better than other people, other Christians and other churches. I told them that they would have to find someone else to do that and resigned.
Because it was a very small church, I worked a regular job and continue to do so for a city government. I know all about wasteful spending and corruptness. In the past I have worked for public school districts and I learned that outside of a few caring, thoughtful, dedicated teachers it’s all about the money and making good authority obeying drones out of the children. My kids still go to public schools. They come home and tell me what they were taught and then I tell them the truth, it’s all I can do.
I guess I’m just tired. I’m tired of looking up at a blue sky in the morning and then watching it, not so slowly, get covered by a white haze coming from the backs of jets at high altitude. I’m not arguing chemtrails, it’s just a fact for me. I’m tired of water that’s not safe to drink, food that’s slowly killing me and not having the will to truly change my bad nutritional habits. I’m tired of the main stream media lying constantly or mixing in a little truth to lead as many astray as they can. I’m tired of good people like Ron Paul being marginalized, patronized, listened to and then completely ignored. I’m tired of being called a terrorist, a right wing extremist, a conspiracy theorist, an idiot and a nut job wacko. And I’m tired of Christians burying their heads in the sand saying it is just a sign of the end times, God is in control and we should just sit back and do nothing unless they take our Bibles away from us. Well, maybe God is waiting for US to DO something or at least SAY something against this evil before He acts. Until then the government isn’t going to take your Bibles away because they know you will be good little servants according to Romans 13.
I’m sorry. I just feel that you all are the only ones I can talk to anymore. I sound like a whiner and others have it much worse but it brings me some relief to put to words what is eating me alive.
Thanks.
equanimity.
jesus talked about being persistent all the time. don't let any craving or aversion agitate you to misery. keep your mind equanimous.
I'm right with there with
I'm right with there with you brother. Yours is one post that I read every single word. Your post was just what I needed. We are in this together. Never, ever, ever give up.
Daily Paul ~ Nobody does it better.
I've learned more than anyone will ever know here on Daily Paul, but this may be one the best threads I have ever read. Thanks whatsnext for taking the time to write your story and thank you all you Dpers for taking the time to reply.
~~~~~~~~~~
"When you get into a tight place and everything goes against you, till it seems as though you could not hang on a minute longer, never give up then, for that is just the place and time that the tide will turn." ~Harriet Beecher Stowe
Cool ...
... run.
http://www.dailypaul.com/node/89767#comment-990155
You are not alone----that's for sure!!
Reading these posts makes me realize what a wonderful bunch of people post on Daily Paul!
I would suggest planting a garden, if you have the space. If you don't have a place--grow something in pots! Gardening is a good thing to do with your kids and some fresh veggies are good!
The bible is a history book, and worth reading even if you aren't a believer.
Studying the bible verse by verse and looking up the words in the original language used puts a different perspective on what is to come.
I watch Shepherd's Chapel every weekday morning, (www.shepherdschapel.com and I am encouraged that we are doing exactly what God wants us to be doing--opposing evil and educating others. We have no reason to fear, and every reason to stand firm.
I think we are all being tested
ron heringhauser: A very moving post whatsnext. My prayers are with you and all of my fellow Americans suffering through these horrible days. I live in a rustbelt city in Ohio, close to Detroit, and things are getting uglier by the day. Our city is planning on laying off 150 policemen, no money for road repair etc. The collapse of the auto industry will be catastrophic, nationwide. I can't even imagine how bad things will get over the next year. I'm retired and my wife passed away 16 months ago. For most of my life I was a union worker and voted democrat. Three years ago I watched Aaron Russo's America, Freedom to Fascism, and woke up from my slumber. I belonged to a Ron Paul meetup group, and also a 9/11 truth group. We are all living in trying times (some worse than others), but we must not give up. The vast majority of humanity are good people and we must band together, hold hands, and resist this dark evil, which is trying to enslave us all. Hang in there, we can and must defeat these evil, greedy, control freaks. God Bless you all.
ron heringhauser
Solution
The brutal honesty in your post was, to say the least, moving.
There is a solution; however, you must keep an open mind and an open heart.
These books saved me. Perhaps you may be able to get some use out of the messages found therein.
The Secret (Also a Documentary)
The Key to Living the Law of Attraction
Hidden Messages in Water
The Four Agreements
With love and peace,
Bet Rily
Most do not fully understand scripture. The pulpit has mis...
Most Christians and churchgoers do not fully understand scripture. Seminaries, churches, pastors, teachers, etc. have watered down and either been ignorant or do not take the time to study and know what scripture says for themselves. What knowledge they have is only from hear say or given by those who intentionally mislead.
We can understand and rightly divide scripture as Paul explains. It is amazing how similar the corruption in politics and the corruption in the name of religion is. Due to the fact that we as a people have been complacent with our so called political system until recently we have done the same with our christian standards. We have left our constitutional beliefs and our biblical standards. Disregarding both has done great harm to this country. We are now reaping what we have sown.
It is not to late to get back on track. First we must study. Study to show ourselves approved. Both our constitution and our Bible. If we understand what our freedoms and liberties are according to both scripture and the constitution we will understand how to take accountability for all we do.
More importantly, if we rightly divide scripture we will know how to stand for our freedoms and liberties and become the men and women we were designed to be.
I have found a site that has helped me put many circumstances in perspective.The site is Grace Ambassadors Bible Fellowship dot com. Enjoy in learning how to understand why you believe the way we should and take accountability for your actions.
Great summation Pastor Paul
especially the part about bible touting "christians", biggest phony's of all imo. Anyone looking for a quick easy to understand explanation on organized religion ought to turn to a short video clip by George Carlin. As far as starting an argument about chemtrails (and by the way thank you) i wouldn't worry to much about that here, seems not to many can make the connection between life, liberty, economics and the 24/7 tax dollar funded military chemtrail operations that are killing our ecosystem. I wish you luck, i really do.
I wish I had something wise
I wish I had something wise to say to you, but I don't. You have found your own path and I wish you the courage to keep following it.
I will pray for you and your family. I am praying for myself, too, because I feel alternately strong and weak, and wonder what *is* the right way to go. Spiritual bushwacking maybe?
Experience hath shewn, that even under the best forms of government those entrusted with power have, in time, and by slow operations, perverted it into tyranny.
Thomas Jefferson
Malo periculosam libertatem quam quietam servitutem. ("I prefer the tumult of liberty to the quiet of servitude"). Thomas Jefferson to James Madison, 30 January 1787.
Keep the faith
I don't know you, but I will pray for you and your family.
Don't ever give up, keep going one day at a time. Remember we were born to get to Heaven. That is eternity, this life is very brief.
"All men in power should be distrusted.." -James Madison
"All men in power should be distrusted.." -James Madison
Hang in there...never lose
Hang in there...never lose in yourself...
"The question isn't who is going to let me, it's who is going to stop me."-Ayn Rand
You excell in preaching the good word of Liberty.
This country needs this type of spiritual guidance you seem to be on the verge of providing.
You came to the right place
You came to the right place evidently. Stay strong with the Bible and your convictions. The Bible DOES NOT tell us to sit back and wait for the end of times. We have to concentrate on being moral and not hypocrytes. We cannot lay down and let these people just assume their powers that defy the Consititution. We DO have to fight. NOT with our guns, but for our guns; for our property, and our freedom.
Enjoy and appreciate your blue skies. During the fight, we will loose friends and family due to difference of opinion. Most of us who come to this site come for one common thing: Restoring Liberty. You are not alone. God is ALWAYS watching all of us.
Amen....
but you should never give up the fight.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=S34W-rg8jHY
Outstanding Video
I must say, Bravo on that video. It was very moving. Ron Paul will truly be known as one of the greatest American heroes for centuries to come. Our founding fathers warned us about oppressive government and greedy bankers, but little by little we have let them undermind the principles our nation was founded on; thus testing our convictions as a liberated people. Ron Paul is waking us up. We can, and must pass this test.
'whatsnext' - Thank you for putting yourself out there. I assure you that you are not alone. Countless others, myself included, feel exactly the same way. We hear of all these terrible things happening in the news; wars, foreclosures, greedy, propaganda. Then we see these things happening all around us.
I told myself just a few months ago that it was time to start getting involved. I found out who my representatives are. I started writing them, faxing them, emailing them. But nothing seems to make a difference. I "woke up" to the inequities of our government a few years ago, but I didn't start getting involved until recently; and I can already see myself getting discouraged because the wealth of our nation rests in the hands of just a few men. Men that just want to control everything.
I commend you sir!!! Don't give up hope now. People are waking up across the country, and across the world, at an alarming rate. Our finest hour has yet to come.
Yes, it is a great video!
I thank Nui for posting, we need encouragement like this, don't we?
Me too.
"I’m tired of water that’s not safe to drink, food that’s slowly killing me and not having the will to truly change my bad nutritional habits."
So, I chase down the raw food lifestyle, and the world becomes clear.
Here's a good book on the raw lifestyle and on sale now:
http://www.livefoodfactor.com/specialoffer/index.html
Further, I currently enjoy working from home, and highly recommend you view this 14 minute vedio.
http://larrysarver.buildlastingsuccess.com/
And never forget, “Humans, despite our artistic pretensions, our sophistication and many accomplishments, owe the fact of our existence to a six-inch layer of topsoil and the fact that it rains.”
And never forget, “Humans, despite our artistic pretensions, our sophistication and many accomplishments, owe the fact of our existence to a six-inch layer of topsoil and the fact that it rains.”
Don't worry the word won't hurt you
http://www.rense.com/general85/chemm.htm
Thanks for the link agent80.
excerpt:
"Many private citizens have tested soil, water, and snow to find dangerous levels of poisons in them. Why cannot we harness this shared concern? How long are we going to be unwitting test subjects for these deadly daily assaults? When will we wake up and put a collective stop to this criminal activity?"
And never forget, “Humans, despite our artistic pretensions, our sophistication and many accomplishments, owe the fact of our existence to a six-inch layer of topsoil and the fact that it rains.”
Hugs to my brother!
I am truely sorry to hear about your plight. I have become more and more disenchanted by the denominational church, including my own. They seem to think that voting for the lesser of two evils is better than voting your conscience and not getting anything you want. Hang in there! There is a remanant of Christians who realize that personal freedom is important. God will bring like-minded people your way, maybe even in unexpected places! (like church!) ;)
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Libera me, let the truth break, what my fears make--Leslie Phillips
There is no God who condones taking the life of an innocent human being. (but I want you to pay for it, like it or not!) --Barack Obama at the National Prayer Breakfast
But that man should play the tyrant over God, and find Him a better man than himself, is astonishing drama indeed!~~D. Sayers
There is no difference between an authoritarian government from the right or the left...F. A.Schaeffer
Thanks for your story.
affirmation: President Paul
Remember the saying "ignorance is bliss?" Well, we're way past that now and all of this can most certainly eat you up. Keep your focus: a beautiful family, health and growing knowledge.
Do you have room to start a garden? It'd be a great project with your family, you'd all eat well and then do some canning for the winter months. Working with the earth can heal a great deal of sorrow and eating the fruits of your labor can bring great joy. Food pantries, I believe, are set up to make people feel awful.
Email me and I'll send you some seeds:)
We are blessed to have the DailyPaul; this is family:)
Remember: YOU ARE NOT ALONE.
affirmation: President Paul 2008
A little about myself
I'm 27 years old and I was raised a Jehovah's Witness. During my "awakening" process, I found myself slipping further and further into depression about the very issues that you mention. You see, as part of my journey in order to be a part of this freedom movement I had to leave my church and therefore I was subsequently shunned. Yes, that means none of my former friends and family will talk to me.(under their own rules they are not allowed to) I must admit, although I knew for some time that my religion was a giant fallacy, I stayed and tried to pretend because it was "comfortable." When one is a baptised member of the church, your whole life revolves around the church. Although you must deal with "other" people in day to day interaction through school, work, etc, you are not supposed to have any secular realtionships with people outside of the church. It was very hard to turn my whole life upside down, but I love knowledge. I suppose it is true: "He that increases knowledge increases sorrow"
I've read somewhere that people who find their religion to be full of crap fall into supporting a political figure or party due to their own need for something fullfilling afterwards. Perhaps that is true. However, I do not think Dr. Paul is in infallable, nor do I agree with him one hundred percent, but I did need somewhere to rally my spirit and to me, the "true" religion is freedom.
Jesus called on us to be fishers of men. I will fish for men's souls in the sense that I will point out their chains to them. Granted, some people have come to love their chains, and for some, ignorance truly is bliss. And yet, a remnant does remain. Perhaps you and I, along with those here, will change this reality for the better. Never regret the knowledge that you possess. Remember Hosea 4:6
huge hug
I have been sitting here reading the replies to your post. There are very, very good people here. Not just of faith, but of heart, courage, and compassion. Each of us are having "reality bites" moments, but we are here - fighting - trying not to give in to the pressure. And when it overwhelms...we find we have friends. Is that not the coolest feeling ever? God is in control, and He warned us of hard times and a trying of faith. That means things will be difficult - not easy. Understanding what is going on around us is not a guarantee that those times will be easier. Rather, it is the opportunity to understand and to prepare. I think everyone here are the luckiest people in the world because our eyes have been opened to a truth that so many are blind to. For those of the Christian faith, govt. is very important in God's Word because God's govt. will replace man's corrupt one. For some of us, this "true" govt. is simply understood. No wonder it is so difficult to explain to those that haven't got a clue. Sometimes the truth can be a burden, be of good strength. You have come so far, has He ever deserted you? Trust Him.
God Bless you my friend
He already has: You have your wife, your health, 5 children, a job, and most importantly, you have awareness.
I don't say this to diminish at all the sense of exhaustion or loss that you are feeling, but I do think that you should take some comfort in the fact that those things most important remain to you, and in that you have the chance to fight the good fight. These losses, these depredations, the meanness and disingenuousness and corruption that we find all around us are depleting, but at least we know where to turn our attention, have a clear sense of what the battle is. At least we are no longer flailing about in the darkness against an evil we know is there but can neither see nor name.
Maybe the answer for you, which will repair your personal life and help to repair that of our society is to turn your attention to fixing those problems you see around you. Maybe there's a large Ron Paul meetup or active C4L chapter around you that can help you out, get your feet on the ground pointed int he right direction. Maybe, if not, you can start one. Who knows, but perhaps if you ask Him, he'll point you in the right direction.
Anthony De Mello...
Hang on brother! We come into this life to learn hard lessons. Keep your faith in Love and God, whatever "word" you choose....Truth is real, and its rarely well represented by institutions. Try some of these videos from a truly authentic sage, Anthony De Mello....Yes they (sages) are profoundly rare.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4Y3Q7H2urto&eurl=http%3A%2F%2...
Dont throw the baby out with the bathwater... Stay with the mystics, ie Jesus, Buddha, Lao Tsu etc.... Let go the institutions!
there is about 40 or so parts to this youtube series....Better than gold ;)
Bad Advice!
De Mello may enjoy some fame but he's just a new age guru with a slightly Christian slant giving advice that will lead him and his followers to hell. Sounds sweet to the ears, but if you look around at the "culture" these gurus come out of, it's demonic ... full of suffering and hopelessness.
I don't much care for you lumping Jesus Christ in with Buddha and the rest of the gang either. Buddha didn't die for you and me, so that we have the chance to get to heaven. Only Jesus did that!
Your Faith Has Made You
Your Faith Has Made You Well..Go And Sin No More..
God Bless..
In Liberty,
"The Pearl"
don't let yourself become miserable
jesus christ knew craving and aversion lead to misery. we are always trying to be happy in every single thing we do. even in the most mundane activities. we can try to be happy and take it in the wrong direction, but we can also be happy free of craving and aversion.
all americans are on some form of welfare and have been enslaved to it in some form. it doesn't have to be what everyone normally thinks welfare is. whether it is the typical social security or food stamps or it's fiat currency and listening to public radio that was subsidized by the government. all of us get paid in the un-denomination of fiat currency, the food stamps of money. don't feel bad about yourself. you can still fight for liberty and learn more about it. be happy. it's what you're trying to do right now anyway, along with everyone else.
Sir, After reading your
Sir,
After reading your post, I wanted to share the realization I came to within the last year. I too am a man in my 30s who has grown up in Baptist churches. Over the past two years, I've learned so much from people and organizations like Dr. Paul and the Mises Institute. It has awakened me to the reality of the truth that all is not as it appears to be. The oft made comparison to the 'Matrix' really is, in my opinion, the most fitting description. Like you, when I came to this realization I wanted to wake up others and to a certain degree, have been fairly successful. However, the people I have been the most disappointed with, as far as being willing to consider facts not presented in the main stream, are those who call themselves believers. I must say how tired I am of the majority of these people's inability to repudiate the wicked policies of the Republican Party in action (e.g., voting) as well as in word. I'm tired of the same types of people (i.e., pastors, Sunday School teachers, youth ministers, etc.) who taught me the great stories of the Bible like David and Goliath, Daniel and the lion's den, and the three Hebrew children and the fiery furnace not practicing what they preach. What were these stories all about anyway? The answer is obvious - standing for what's right regardless of what the outcome may appear to be. This is what I was always taught, but where are these teachers now when it is our turn to make a stand against evil? Their excuses have been numerous: "Don't throw away your vote," "We can't do anything about it anyway," "God ordained government as an authority to be obeyed" (always and without question???), "That person doesn't have a chance at winning," etc., etc., etc.. Hearing comments like these made me realize something - either these people don't really believe what they say, or they are cowards! Who said we have to win? I was reminded of what David said when he was ridiculed by his brothers for saying that someone needed to stand up against Goliath: "Is there not a cause?" (I Sam. 17:29) He understood that it wasn't his own personal well-being that mattered, but rather the 'cause'. If you believe as do I, that the whole purpose of man is to bring glory to God, what is the example set throughout the whole of the Scriptures (OT and NT)? Is it to stand for what's right when it's popular and everyone is doing it or when you're all alone? A few names immediately come to mind (among many others): Noah, Abraham, Joseph, Moses, Joshua and Caleb, David, Elijah, Esther, Daniel, Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego, Stephen, Paul, John the Baptist, and of course, Jesus Christ. The point is that if it's right, then we ought to stand for it regardless of what our odds of winning are. The cause of liberty is a just and right one.
I would also like to encourage you to keep your focus on the Word of God and not on so-called "Christian" men who obviously don't care to apply to their lives the teachings of Christ (Mt. 5). I learned a long time ago not to put very much stock in them because being merely men, they tend to disappoint. Their hypocrisy, however, doesn't change the faithfulness of the Word of God. Bringing glory to God is what is important, not our own personal wants and wishes. Finally, if you're interested, here is an example that has always been an encouragement to me of someone who not only understood this truth in principle, but lived it in practice: John Huss (in particular, his trial, condemnation and execution), http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jan_Hus. Would we be so honored as to have a testimony like this man.
'Would you be free men or slaves?'
Restore the Republic.
'Would you be free men or slaves?'
Restore the Republic.