that I oddly enjoy being presented material in which the conscious line between fact and fiction has been removed.
One suggestion in critiquing the piece from my perspective as a reader is that you add reference to the police officer's presence prior to the fifth paragraph. It would be advantageous for the reader to know he's present, witnessing the event, before it's played out. As it stands, the coffee sipping thing is good, but it still comes across kinda like, "and oh, there was a cop there who watched all this..."
If that's too much of a change to do, let me suggest this...
"He walked out the door. The attendant called an ambulance. The police officer took a sip from his coffee."
"He walked out the door. A police officer took a sip from his coffee. The attendant called an ambulance."
The above change remedies the notion I originally had that perhaps the cop showed up with the ambulance.
"He walked out the door. The attendant called an ambulance. A police officer watching from the snack counter took a sip from his coffee."
I also commend you on the story if your simple intent was to post something that would generate interestingly diverse comments and stimulate subtle bits of contention among DP readers. It's a sly vehicle as such.
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