Comment: Breaking News!

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Breaking News!

'Al Qaeda In Childhood (AQIC) members killed in drone strike during soccer practice'

Today [insert middle eastern nation] officials announced that Al Qaeda In Childhood (AQIC) members were attacked in a targeted drone strike while practicing soccer at their local elementary school. There are confirmed reports of several fatalities, the dead range in age from 5-7.

An official, speaking on condition of anonymity - in a nation where NSA is monitoring all communication and already know who the official is - said it is believed NSA confused the intercepted pre-practice meet up phone call that said 'football,' with Presidenterrorist Warbama's "nuclear football." The threat was deemed credible and urgent.

There are unconfirmed reports that a double-tap secondary drone strike targeted the childrens' parents and grandparents, all members of Al Qaeda In Adulthood (AQIA), who were present watching the soccer practice. They allegedly tried to rush onto the field and attempt rescue and first aid of the terrorists killed and wounded.

Presidenterrorist Liebama, in a press conference earliar at the White lie House said "Al Qaeda In Childhood is on the run, they're playing games. But let me be clear, this is not a competition. We have no morals or empathy. We commit acts of terrorism in our fight against terrorism. Comrades."

Although the attack was criticized as a success, it was also hailed as a failure. Al Qaeda In the Womb (AQIW) has vowed future attacks. Presidenterrorist Dronebama was quoted as saying "They'll be lucky if they get to be born. I plan to cruise missile their pregnant mothers in their sleep in the wee morn."

https://www.madeuplinks.com/future-stories/terrorists-are-ch...