Comment: I like it, too. If I may, I

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I like it, too. If I may, I

I like it, too. If I may, I will make two suggestions which you may feel free to ignore.
I believe in the first lines you should change the word 'concede' to 'conceal'. If you don't like it that way, I would change it to 'can see' (but I like conceal better and do not think concede does the trick).
Also, I believe you should change the line after the dream suffocates you to "Your breath calls you to awake". This fits better with a previous line about the sirens.
That is my 2 cents.
I really liked it, wtg!