The Military is honest and candid about having an authoritarian hierarchical structure. It is bad for business to have people under "command" begin questioning the motives and moral authority of the War Machine. Your friends are good people that are subjugated in a system that is built on social control through use of psychological reconditioning.
Circulate a book by the most decorated Marine in history. Every American should read that book. Maybe send it out in an email.
I bet eventually your friends will come around. Eventually, most everyone will.